twitchquotes:
Born too late to explore the Earth, born too early to explore the universe, born perfectly to explore dank memes ◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕
twitch chat
What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas
Flanders Diddly Spamly Doodly
▒▒▒▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄
░▄███████▀▀▀▀▀▀███████▄
░▐████▀▒DIDDLY▒▒▒▒▀██████▄
░███▀▒▒▒▒SPAMLY▒▒▒▒▒▀█████
░▐██▒▒▒▒▒▒DOODLY▒▒▒▒▒▒████▌
░▐█▌▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒████▌
░░█▒▄▀▀▀▀▀▄▒▒▄▀▀▀▀▀▄▒▐███▌
░░░▐░░░▄▄░░▌▐░░░▄▄░░▌▐███▌
░▄▀▌░░░▀▀░░▌▐░░░▀▀░░▌▒▀▒█▌
░▌▒▀▄░░░░▄▀▒▒▀▄░░░▄▀▒▒▄▀▒▌
░▀▄▐▒▀▀▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▒█
░░░▀▌▒▄██▄▄▄▄████▄▒▒▒▒█▀
░░░░▄██████████████▒▒▐▌
░░░▀███▀▀████▀█████▀▒▌
░░░░░▌▒▒▒▄▒▒▒▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▐
░░░░░▌▒▒▒▒▀▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐
Classic
FitnessGram Pacer Test
The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
Classic
You need a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
Rick and Morty
Classic
A New Toucan Has Arrived
░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█▀█▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▄▄░░░░░░░░
░░░░░░░░░░▄██▀░█░░░░░░░░░░▀▀▄▄░░░░
░░░░░░░░░░███▀█▀█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▒▒▒▄███░░░
░░░░░░░░▄██░░░░█░░░░░░░░▀▀▀▀▀▀█░░░
░░░░░░▄███░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
░░░░░█████▄░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
░░░░████████▄▄░█░░░░A░NEW░░░░░░░░░
░░░████████████░░░░░░TOUCAN░░░░░░░
░░░▀██████████░░░░░░░░HAS░░░░░░░░░
░░░░██▒▀█▒▀█▀░░░░░░░░░░ARRIVED░░░░
░■▓▓▓▓▓▄▓▓▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓■░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
░░░▄▄███▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
Classic
I fucked Up DVD
Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.