[Copypasta] Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

Mic Muted

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ascii art

March 2015

NA COMING THROUGH LUL

twitchquotes: NA COMING THROUGH LUL

GO TO SCHOOL RISK LIFE LUL

10 IQ PRESIDENT LUL

GETTING MY SISTER PREGNANT LUL

WALL

THINK THEY SAVED WORLD WAR LUL

NA EDUCATION LUL

GOVERMENT SO BAD HAD TO SHUT DOWN LUL

twitch chat

March 2019

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.

January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

Please stop spamming, for Bernard

twitchquotes: Guys please stop spamming. My dog, Bernard, looked at my chat and got so dizzy because of the spam that he fell down and hit his noggin right on his food bowl! He couldn't talk for hours. Please stop spamming, for Bernard.

twitch chat

December 2014

Classic

40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14

twitchquotes: This chat disgusts me. 40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14. The other 40% are 14 year olds pretending to be 41. And the remaining 30% just copy pastes the longest message they can find in the chat. Grow up chat, grow up. FailFish

twitch chat

January 2019

[Copypasta] Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

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Mic Muted

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NA COMING THROUGH LUL

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EU vs NA

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

Classic

WallStreetBets

Please stop spamming, for Bernard

Classic

40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

[Copypasta] Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

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Mic Muted

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NA COMING THROUGH LUL

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EU vs NA

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

Classic

WallStreetBets

Please stop spamming, for Bernard

Classic

40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

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