[Copypasta] That's some bad shit right there

twitchquotes: do NOT sign me the FUCK up 👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀 bad shit ba̷̶ ԁ sHit 👎 thats ❌ some bad 👎👎shit right 👎👎 th 👎 ere 👎👎👎 right ❌ there ❌ ❌ if i do ƽaү so my selｆ🚫 i say so 🚫 thats not what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ 🚫 👎 👎👎НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ 👎 👎👎 👎 🚫 👎 👀 👀 👀 👎👎Bad shit
twitch chat
April 2016
I used to be a real ad
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Hopefully the FBI can find Jack Ma

FBI set up a tip line for people to send in videos and pictures of the people who stormed the capitol yesterday... I’ve been sending them pictures of Jack Ma. Hopefully they can find him.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

G2, aka “Gold 2”

twitchquotes: G2, aka “Gold 2”, named after their players average skill level. They are currently the best team in EU and are best known for their inting midlaner, CRAPS, and their inability to defeat PVB, Vietnam’s worst team.
twitch chat
September 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021

Kamala Harris loves Fweedom

Senator Kamala Harris started her life’s work young. She laughs from her gut, the way you would with family, as she remembers being wheeled through an Oakland, California, civil rights march in a stroller with no straps with her parents and her uncle. At some point, she fell from the stroller (few safety regulations existed for children's equipment back then), and the adults, caught up in the rapture of protest, just kept on marching. By the time they noticed little Kamala was gone and doubled back, she was understandably upset. "My mother tells the story about how I’m fussing," Harris told the magazine. "And she’s like, ‘Baby, what do you want? What do you need?’ And I just looked at her and I said, ‘Fweedom.’"
January 2021

2020 US Election

TriHard v2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠟⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠉⠻⠿⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠹⢿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⠏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⡇ ⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡇ ⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠇ ⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠃ ⣇⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀ ⣿⣿⣤⣤⡄⠄⠄⣠⣬⣼⣯⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⣿⣯⣔⣆⣠⣍⣿⣿⣿⡿⣛⡉⡐⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢤⣿⣀⣁⡄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣿⣿⣿⣆⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⡀⢋⢩⣙⣛⣿⣿⡟⠉⠋⠛⠛⢋⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⢼⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡥⡠⢒⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠅⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡈⣿⣿⣯⣭⣭⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣉⣉⣛⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
ascii art
June 2019
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