[Copypasta] NA ULT LUL

twitchquotes: Listen up you fcking dweebs, this is a WAKE UP CALL to all those who type "NA ULT LUL". I'm from NA and let me tell you what happens when I use my Ultimate Ability (Q on PC, Triangle on PS4, Y on X-box 1). The enemy team is eviscerated. Decimated. Their souls are expelled from the server and banished to Hell. They wallow in their own filth and shit for 10,000 days and it is disgusting. So next time you type "NA ULT LUL" you fcking remember this post.
twitch chat
January 2017

Classic

Overwatch

I used to be a real ad
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Don't ever smoke

twitchquotes: My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your stream gave me cancer anyway.
twitch chat
January 2020

Classic

Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

twitchquotes: Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE πŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ
twitch chat
October 2015

Classic

Do British people even exist?

Do british people actually exist? I mean, they must be a meme, there is a not a single thing about them. And I mean it. Let's go through the evidence: Where are they from? Not a single country in the world is named Britain. Some people say they come from England, and England is inside Britain, but if that was the case they would be British they would be Englanders. Also, heard some silly theories about them coming from whales. Guys, no, whale people do not exist. Whales live in the sea. There is a consensus on British people coming from Europe, but then we are left with a whole continent of possible locations. That's as good as nothing. What do they eat? Every country has at least one main dish. Even the US has their burgers. But these British people, what do they eat? Heard some people associating them with tea, but everyone knows that's an Asian thing. Shouldn't they come from Europe? One of these two points must be wrong them. To me, it looks too sketchy. What language do they speak? I challenge you, putting all my money and my ass on the line here, to find a supposed ""British"" person speaking their native language. Most of then just speak a broken ENGLISH. Yes, english. Really suspicious, huh? And I even tried to look deeper into it. Maybe british just SOUND like english, just like spanish could sound like portuguese for a non-speaker. So I looked up "british dictionary on google" and what I found was shocking: every word in there was AMERICAN. I kid you not. What this could mean is beyond my capabilities, but I can safely assure you that british people do not exist .
December 2020

British People

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It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked...

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out
March 2017

Classic

I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory

twitchquotes: I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory trying to provide pasta to hard-working people all across the world. After a long day of work, I come to Kripp's chat to unwind and have thought-driven discussions about my favorite game and favorite streamer. When I get here, however, all I see is pasta after pasta. All I want to do is escape my miserable life, but you fucks keep spamming.
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

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