[Copypasta] My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high

twitchquotes: My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. I've never actually taken an IQ test, mind you, but my educated guess is that, if I did, my score would be whatever is the highest possible. No doubt your IQ is lower than mine, but please don't feel stupid or insecure about this, it's not your fault. You're probably just born that way. And you know what? Thank your lucky stars and subpar genetic makeup that you don't have to bear the burden of brilliance like I have to. Being incredibly intelligent is a curse. This is not just one of the many astute observations I have every day, by the way, it is a fact recently confirmed by science.
twitch chat
January 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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Mesmerized

twitchquotes: ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢉⣠⣴⣴⣦⣦⣄⡉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠐⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡂⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡟⣽⠂⠈⠉⢢⡻⣿⣿⣿⠟⣩⡖⠉⠄⠉⢷⣽⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣇⠻⠄⠄⠄⠸⠛⣹⣿⣧⡈⠻⠧⠄⠄⢀⠞⢹⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⣿⣷⣴⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⡅⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣙⡛⢛⣋⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢨⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⠉⠩⠍⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣯⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣿⠁⡀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢀⠈⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠘⠻⠿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
twitch chat
April 2019

Morbius is love. Morbius is life.

I was only nine years old. I loved Morbius so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Morbius every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Morbius is love", I would say, “Morbius is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Morbius. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Morbius. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, “It’s morbin time". He grabs me with his powerful morby hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Morbius. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Morbius. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Morbius. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Morbius looks him straight in the eye, and says, "Get morbed". Morbius leaves through my window. Morbius is love. Morbius is life.
June 2022

Morbius

King Kamehameha

twitchquotes: Aloha Forsen, my name is King Kamehameha, King of Hawaii. I want to invite you to come to our tropical island paradise to teach us Cardstone. You will be compensated with a million palm leaves (over 10 million Swedish dollars). We would love to hear from you. Please no copypasterino
twitch chat
January 2015
Forsen

Hearthstone

You know what's worse than Ajit Pai?

twitchquotes: You know what's worse than Ajit Pai? To access the punchline to this joke, you must purchase the Punchline Package for $14.99
twitch chat
December 2017

Net Neutrality

Plane

⠀⠀⠀⣖⠲⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠉⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠹⡀⣠⢤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⠀⡧⢤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⢄⣹⣅⣜⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⢹⠚⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣀⠴⢒⣉⡹⣶⣤⣀⡉⠉⠒⠒⠒⠤⠤⣀⣀⣀⠇⠀⠀⢸⠠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠉⠒⠯⣟⣲⠦⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠒⠻⢥⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⣲⡬⠭⠿⢷⣦⣤⢄⣀⠀⠀⠚⠛⠛⠓⢦⡀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠤⠴⠚⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣉⡽⣕⣯⡉⠉⠉⠑⢒⣒⡾ ⠀⠀⣀⡠⠴⠒⠉⠉⠀⢀⣀⣀⠤⡤⢶⣶⣋⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀ ⣖⣉⣁⣠⠤⠶⡶⡶⢍⡉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠒⠯⠜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢦⣯⠇
February 2020
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