[Copypasta] For people that use "XD"

twitchquotes: But the real question is, when this musing entered your mind, did you really make such a face? Was it so funny that your face contorted into a gaping wide-mouthed smile as your eyes aggressively squinted shut? Did you truly "ex dee"? Were you able to see your screen as you typed with your eyes held steadfast as though they were steel vice grips clamping with hundreds of pounds of force?
twitch chat
February 2019
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Doublelift dodges Imaqtpie in queue

twitchquotes: Doublelift fired up his stream for another day of soloQ, but foolishly forgot to check if Imaqtpie was in a game. He opened up QT’s stream to find him sitting in queue
 He frantically began tabbing between his client and QT’s stream, then one after the other
 both queues popped. “I need the toilet” he said to his chat. He ran to the wall and unplugged his internet. He was safe for another day.
twitch chat
March 2017
imaqtpie

Classic

League of Legends

Wow! I love Verizonℱ!

twitchquotes: Wow! I love Verizonℱ! I’m glad that the internet is so free! Isn’t it great to say whatever you want and have your opinion represented equally across the internet! It’s really great! Good thing Verizon has spent millions on having that removed I’m sure they won’t abuse it! Thank you Verizonℱ! I love Verizonℱ! Don’t you love Verizonℱ?! Say it! Say it! Say you love Verizonℱ! Can’t you see they’re protecting us from all those small businesses who want to steal a fraction of their market?! Don’t you hate those people disagreeing with you?! I sure love Verizonℱ! Thank you Verizonℱ! Thank you for sticking your gold plated rusty knives up our asses and looking us dead in the eyes and saying “this is what’s best for a free and open internet” and slowly twisting it deeper and deeper until we eventually just give out and shit money into your fat wallets!
twitch chat
December 2017

Net Neutrality

I am not receiving 328.2 million votes on my election

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although America has 328.2 million people, I am not receiving 328.2 million votes on my election. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to vote for me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to vote for me. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Classic

Sanity lost to Amogus

Ha...hahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That's it! I surrender! My sanity can't take this anymore! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I feel like killing someone! I'm not even joking!! I'M FEELING REALLY SUSNO no no i'm NOT sus, Amogus isn't real...but why are there VENTS all over my house?!?!?! OH NO...the power just went out...a fuse was blown...oh God, oh fuck!!! I have to go to ELECTRICAL!!! My roommate looking kinda SUS right now! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Among Us is painted on my walls in blood...I've been humming the Among Drip theme song to myself for three months now...SUS!!! IMPOSTER! RED VENTED!!! HAHAHAHAHA! KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Never buy a keyboard off a chinese bidding website

twitchquotes: áŽșá”‰á”›á”‰Êł ᔇᔘʞ ᔃ á”á”‰Êžá”‡á”’á”ƒÊłá”ˆ ᔒᶠᶠ ᔒᶠ ᔃ á¶œÊ°á¶Šá¶°á”‰Ëąá”‰ ᔇᶊᔈᔈᶊᶰᔍ Ê·á”‰á”‡Ëąá¶Šá”—á”‰ï»ż
twitch chat
November 2018
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