twitchquotes:
Now little Jimmy what do you do if someone bullies you? "I-Ignore them?" Little Jimmy says. "NO!" His parent screams. The parent leans into his ear and whispers "Delete them..."
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I used to be a real ad
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Extreme Sodium Saltstorm 9000
SCANNING FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE ASKED
🚨 SCANNING 💽 FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE ASKED 🚨
25% COMPLETE 🕒
50% COMPLETE 🕕
75% COMPLETE 🕘
❗ERROR❗
THIS SCAN HAS FOUND ❌ NO ❌ PERSON(S) WITHIN A 1000 KM RADIUS WHO ASKED.
Who Asked?
Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on
twitchquotes:
I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
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Kripp gets married in a shack
twitchquotes:
Rania: "why are you playing Diablo 3, Kripp? How can we afford Big Fat Greek Wedding with 5k Diablo viewers?" But the Kripp doesn't listen. He plays Diablo 3 and loses all his viewers and gets married in a shack.
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Kripp
Message deleted: memes too dank
twitchquotes:
<message deleted: memes too dank>
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imaqtpie