[Copypasta] It starts with a surge of adrenaline

twitchquotes: It starts with a surge of adrenaline. Signals flood the nervous system. Pupils race back and forth behind closed eyelids. Then open. Now it’s up to you to decide what to do with it.
twitch chat
March 2019
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020

Burger King tweet thread: women belong in the kitchen tweet

Women belong in the kitchen. If they want to, of course. Yet only 20% of chefs are women. We're on a mission to change the gender ratio in the restaurant industry by empowering female employees with the opportunity to pursue a culinary career. #IWD - We are proud to be launching a new scholarship programme which will help female Burger King employees pursue their culinary dreams!
March 2021

Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front

twitchquotes: Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front. When it comes to sexuality, I'm about as hetero as they come. If a gay guy came on to me, I'd be like, "No way, bro. I'm a straight-up party boy who's into chicks." Yup, one gay dude wouldn't stand a chance. It would take at least four or five gay guys strapping me down to make it inside me. Sorry, fellas, that's just how straight I am. And even then I wouldn't make it easy. I'd be like, "Hey look! There goes George Michael!" And they'd all shriek "Where?!" at once, and I'd make a break for it, and they'd be like, "He's getting away! Chase him! I want his butt!" But I wouldn't just give them my butt. They'd have to take it. And once they got me strapped down, I'd stop fighting it because that would be giving them what they want. And I don't want them to enjoy it. If anyone's going to enjoy it, it's going to be me. So, I'd just relax into it and taunt them by telling them how ripped and sexy I find them and letting them know how much I'm enjoying myself. So, even though I'd have a bunch of ripped guys all taking turns on my butt, I'd still be enjoying it. But only because I forced myself to. It's not like I could fight these guys off. There are too many of them and they want me too much. What am I, Chuck Norris?" I'm not against homosexuality, though. I say to each his own. You're free to do whatever you want.
twitch chat
February 2020

KappaPride

I'm Tanner Jr. btw!

twitchquotes: Hi kripp, I just turned 5 years old! My dad says I'm pretty good at this game at that I should watch your stream to learn how not to play bad. He says he stole your high school girlfriend and does things to your wife in bed everyday. Oh yeah, I'm Tanner Jr. btw! Nice to meet you!
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

A casual player like yourself might get injured!

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Mike Morhaime, President of Blizzard Entertainment here. I notice you're playing one of our older games. I have to warn you, the games we made in that era weren't casual-friendly. A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing