[Copypasta] Press CTRL + W to prove you are not a bot

twitchquotes: ———————————————————————— imGlitch The Twitch Anti-Bot Algorithm(TM) has detected you may be a bot. Please press the A key on your keyboard and then press the key combo CTRL + W to prove you are not a bot.————————————————————————
twitch chat
May 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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I was only 14 years old I loved xQc so much

I was only 14 years old I loved xQc so much, I had all the merchandise and VODS. I pray to xQc every night, thanking him for the life I've been given. "xQc is love" I say "xQc is life" My dad hears me and calls me a Juicer. I knew he was jealous of my devotion to xQc. I called him baj He hits me and sends me to sleep I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed, really cold. I feel something warm... Its xQc! I was so happy. He whispers in my ear "This is my jungle" He grabs me with his hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I'm ready. I spread my ass cheeks for xQc. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for xQc. I can feel my butt tearing and eyes watering. I want to please xQc. He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with the juice. My dad walks in. xQc looks him straight in the eye and says, He got the Juice now. xQc leaves through my window. xQc is love. xQc is life.
January 2022
xQcOW

Hello Moonman or whatever your name is

twitchquotes: Hello Moonman or whatever your name is, I just wanted to tell you to please stop ruining my chat experience with these "smugs" and "smegs" and what not. Honestly, I find them absolutely infuriating to see in every chatroom I stumble upon. Fuck that dumb purple lady.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon

twitchquotes: Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon into my anus because the local shops had run out of apricots (I buy a lot). Using about a gallon of butter, breathing techniques and a few hours I managed to finally get it inside. However it was too uncomfortable so I tried to shit it back out.This is where things got confusing because rather than a melon sliding out half a dozen apricots did. Now there is a chance that I just blacked out upon excreting the cantaloupe and it rolled away somewhere and that I happened to have a dozen or so left over apricots lying around my rectum from earlier but I cannot for the life of me find the melon anywhere.I think I may have the power to anally turn melons into apricots. Further experimentation will be required of course (once my rectum has recovered) but if this turns out to be true then I may be able to solve world hunger.
twitch chat
April 2019

Keanu Reeves you're breathtaking

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⢳⢀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀ ⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⠸⠀⠀⠀⠒⠒⠒⠐⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠒⣋⣙⡒⢰⠀⠤⣖⠒⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀ ⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠸⠀⡇⠉⠉⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀ ⠀⠙⣿⣿⣧⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⠰⠀⠀⠀⣸⠸⣿⣿⠿⠰⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⡠⠙⣲⣔⣅⢡⣰⣷⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⡿⠭⠭⠭⠭⢿⠀⣿⢻⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⣿⢻⠹⣿⠐⠙⠛⠟⠉⢀⣴⡟⢿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡟⠀⠀⠻⣦⣤⣶⠾⠋⠀⠀⠁⡦⢄⢀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠁⡇⠑⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠔⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁ ⠀⠔⠊⠁⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠑⡤⠤⢎⠁⠀⠀⡘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢢⠠⠀⡠⢆⠀⠀⡠⠙⢄⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ You're breathtaking
July 2019
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