[Copypasta] I want a man who is a cunning linguist

twitchquotes: "Are you sure you've ever pleasured a woman before, poppet?" Mother asked with a snear, unamused by the clumsy performance of a rapper who couldn't use his tongue. "I'm doing my best, yo!" he replied, muffled between Mother's thighs. "You talk a big game, Mr. Dab, but you are proving to be quite a disappointment." The tattoo-faced man lifted his head aghast, his voice raising in pitch, "I got you a limo, yo, what else do you want?" Mother chuckled, "I want a man who is a cunning linguist"
twitch chat
May 2019
MOONMOON
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More MOONMOON Copypastas

Hello Moonman or whatever your name is

twitchquotes: Hello Moonman or whatever your name is, I just wanted to tell you to please stop ruining my chat experience with these "smugs" and "smegs" and what not. Honestly, I find them absolutely infuriating to see in every chatroom I stumble upon. Fuck that dumb purple lady.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

there I was, finalizing my reddit post

twitchquotes: there I was, finalizing my reddit post complaining about moonmoons RP, when I heard my mom call me for dinner. Chicken tendies, my favorite. Tonight was the night I was meeting her new boyfriend. I walked downstairs, ready to eat my tendies. I looked up at who was sitting at the table. It was HIM. Bald, small beady eyes, and smelled like cats. It was MoonMoon_OW. And he was fucking my mom. “Why would you do this to me?!” I screamed at my mother, and ran upstairs to make another reddit post
twitch chat
May 2019
MOONMOON

Moonmoon can’t beat a box of oatmeal

twitchquotes: This is fucking sad honestly. This man has been playing this game for hours on end , trying to memorize each and every attack and move. He has died over 1000 times to a box of oatmeal and hasn’t even gotten close to beating it. He comes up with an excuse for every death his chatroom watching him is even trying to give him energy “ GivePLZ TAKE ME ENERGYTakeNRG “ and give him tips which he ignores.Yet he still can’t beat a box of oatmeal how pathetic.
twitch chat
September 2017
MOONMOON

I'm a streamer that is in LOVE with Weebs!

twitchquotes: I'm MoonMoon_OwO! i'm a streamer that is in LOVE with Weebs! That's right! I know it sounds crazy because bald streamers aren't supposed to appreciate true art, but I grew up with anime and have just never really wanted anything to do with normies! It just feels so good to be a degenerate weeb loving this Japanese media! I can't help myself! Their power levels and tourneyment arcs... I'm getting too excited now! I need to go to crunchyroll! I'm going to go watch some anime!
twitch chat
July 2019
MOONMOON

Overwatch professional player xGodSlayerx

twitchquotes: We are gathered here today in memorium of the Overwatch professional player xGodSlayerx. In life, he demanded healing and better teammates who were not bitch idiot noob feeders. In death, he is an icon of Genji players everywhere. His legacy of epic zero-kill dragonblades and Blizzcon-worthy shuriken throwing skills have inspired a generation of one-trick DPS players in Masters and below. Perhaps what he needed was not heal bitch, or shield bitch, but a feel bitch.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

Overwatch

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