[Copypasta] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius

twitchquotes: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next
twitch chat
June 2019
Famous line from the 2000 Gladiator film.
What happened to this ad? :(
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YOU TOOK MY FORTNITE CARD

YOUโ€™RE ๐ŸŒฅ๏ธ SO SUSSY ๐Ÿ˜“๐Ÿ˜“๐Ÿ™Š๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐ŸŽต I ๐Ÿ˜€ KNOW ๐Ÿ’ญ YOU ๐Ÿ‘ˆ TOOK ๐Ÿ‘ซ MY ๐Ÿ˜ FORTNITE ๐ŸŽฎ CARD ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿƒ I ๐Ÿพ KNOW ๐Ÿค” YOU ๐Ÿค– TOOK ๐Ÿคฏ MY ๐Ÿ˜˜ 19 โ— DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ฒ FORTNITE ๐Ÿ’ฉ CARD ๐Ÿ’ณ GIVE ๐Ÿšช๐ŸŒŒ๐Ÿธ ME ๐Ÿ‘ˆ MY ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ˜ฃ 19 โ— DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ฐ FORTNITE ๐Ÿ’ฉ CARD ๐Ÿ’ณ๐Ÿ˜‘ YOU ๐Ÿ‘ˆ๐Ÿ˜ญ BETTER ๐ŸŽฐ GIVE ๐Ÿ‘น ME ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿ’ก MY ๐Ÿฅณ 19 โ— DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ธ FORTNITE ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐ŸŽฎ CARD ๐Ÿ—ƒ I ๐Ÿ‘น NEED ๐Ÿ“ฒ MY ๐Ÿ”‘ 19 โ™ˆ DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ต FORTNITE ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐ŸŽฎ CARD, ๐Ÿ’ณ NOW! ๐Ÿ“…
May 2021

Fortnite

McDonald's BTS Meal

So I was listening to my favorite boy band called 'BTS (I am an army)' on my Samsung earbuds (BTS Edition) using my Samsung Galaxy s20+ (BTS Edition) in my room plastered with BTS poster. Suddenly one of my Army friends (we are BTSSexual and BTSGender) told me that there is a McDonald's BTS meal which almost made me jizz my pants. I ran to McDonald's to buy the BTS meal and came back home. Even though I am an Army (I would have bought their feces if they were selling it), this is intolerable. That was the most uncreative meal ever created. I wish McDonald's would have put Ass-Hair of each members of the band and hidden it in Chicken McNuggets. Like "Hey! I got Jimins Ass-hair in my chicken nuggets! Can't wait to get Kim Teahyung's Ass-hair so I can take his DNA sample and recreate a clone of Kim Teahyung to overrule the world with #Army". bts #army #blm #gaypride #arianagrande
June 2021

Perfect LUL Pyramid

LUL only real LULer can build this perfect pyramid LUL LUL . Try like me !Try like me ! Try like me !! LUL LUL LUL And my pyramid still higher!!!!!! LUL LUL LUL LUL
twitch chat
June 2016

Classic

I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday

twitchquotes: I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday. I told him it would be cool to see him play arena again. He said, โ€œWhy, so you can snipe me at 8 wins?โ€ I was taken aback, and all I could say was โ€œHuh?โ€ but he kept cutting me off and going โ€œhuh? huh? huh?โ€ and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I thought he was going for a brofist, so I extended my hand only to have it slapped away in disgust. Later on I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen murlocs in his hands without paying.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a trollface cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing a trollface mask and black morph suit. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as your mother (after I have sexual intercourse with her) and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made me feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my morph suit. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Cover yourself in oil." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "You mad bro?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "We do a little trolling!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'm still Trollface."
September 2021

NSFW

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