[Copypasta] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius

twitchquotes: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next
twitch chat
June 2019
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More Copypastas

My parents used to watch cockfighting in the bedroom

My parents used to watch cockfighting in the bedroom when they thought we were asleep. I'd hear my mother excitedly talking about how much she enjoyed cocks as they jumped around on the bed. What surprised me though was, when we went to Spain she mentioned how cruel she thought bullfighting was. I never confronted her about the hypocrisy though.
October 2021

My 13 year old son wants 5 dollars so he can "subscribe"

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, mom here, my 13 year old son wants 5 dollars so he can "subscribe". I dont know what that is, but a quick Google search shows Kripp subscribers are linked with NaCL overdose disorder. Can you explain this? - Sincerely, a concerned parent
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

salty

I do not give a shit i simp for pokimane

I do not give a shit i simp for pokimane and I'm a tier 3 sub fuck all those amateur's i wanna smell those pretty feet of yours pokimane you know when i was a little boy i used to slap girls ass when i was young and some of them liked it some of them didn't well guess what i wanna do that to pokimane and make her moan "daddy harder" but heh listen i have way more dirtier plans for pokimane heh i bought every single merchandise pokimane has you know i've come soo far don't mess it up you pussy's ok! I will continue to simp i will continue to slap girl's asses and i don't care if it's sexual assault i WILL DO IT. And i could do it to boys too heh well that's it you understand the whole reason why am writing this.
February 2022
Pokimane

Simps

A casual player like yourself might get injured!

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Mike Morhaime, President of Blizzard Entertainment here. I notice you're playing one of our older games. I have to warn you, the games we made in that era weren't casual-friendly. A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Wagner Opera Topdeckhoffen

twitchquotes: Gᴜᴛᴇɴ Tᴀɢ, Hᴇʀʀ Kʀɪᴘᴘ! Mᴇɪɴ Nᴀᴍᴇ ɪsᴛ Pᴇᴛᴇʀ ᴠᴏɴ Pᴀsᴛᴇɴʜᴏғғᴇɴ. Hᴇʀᴇ ɪɴ Dᴇᴜᴛsᴄʜʟᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ ɴᴇᴡ Wᴀɢɴᴇʀ ᴏᴘᴇʀᴀ Tᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋʜᴏғғᴇɴ. Rᴀɴɪᴀ ɪs Vᴀʟᴋʏʀɪɴᴏ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴋɪʟʟs ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ʀᴇᴠᴇɴɢᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴅᴀs Pᴏʀɴʜᴜʙ. Tʀᴜᴍᴘ ᴘᴏᴜʀs Oʀᴀɴɢᴇɴsᴀғᴛ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢʀᴀᴠᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀ ɪɴ sᴋʏ ᴀs ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟ ɢʜᴏsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ. Pʟᴢ ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘᴘᴇɴ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇɴ ᴅᴏᴏɢᴇɴ ᴅᴀᴀɢᴇɴ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

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