[Copypasta] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius

twitchquotes: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next
twitch chat
June 2019
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce

gf is prego we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital she's still bleeding everywhere by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything he takes one look at ther and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do" "WHY THE FUCK NOT???" "we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
February 2021

Classic

I am a degree 6 zoosexual

twitchquotes: I am a degree 6 Zoosexual, sexually and emotionally attracted to Tyrannosaurs and nothing else. Women don't even do it for me. I am cursed to live my life in the misery that my most powerful emotional fantasies will never be even close to coming true. Life is like hell to me. I will never know true love.
twitch chat
January 2015

I sexually Identify as

I have a dream that one day Plebs and Subs will Spam together in harmony

twitchquotes: I have a dream that one day Plebs and Subs will Spam together in harmony. Plebs should be judged not by the frequency of their spam, but the quality of their pasta! So plebs and subs alike copypasta this for the greater good!
twitch chat
August 2015
Reynad

plebs vs subs

TSM AKA "Throws Six Matches"

twitchquotes: TSM AKA "Throws Six Matches" is a North American team known for their questionable play and inability to win a game. They are currently found in Gate 06 of the Shanghai Pudong Airport making up excuses for not winning a single game at Worlds.
twitch chat
October 2020
Riot Games

League of Legends

Empirical data suggests this is a QTpie stream

twitchquotes: CarlSmile AH! CarlSmile White shirt! CarlSmile Gray screen! CarlSmile Empirical data suggests this is a QTpie stream.
twitch chat
June 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing