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I hate it when people type "xD" 
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More Copypastas
Why did you pick Hero at EVO?
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Nairo, it's been weeks since EVO and I still don't understand why you didn't choose Hero and win the whole thing. It'll be a matter of time before we follow Australia's example and ban him, and you'll be sorry you didn't use his banworthy strength when you could. Also can you use Ganondorf again, he's rlly strong. Sorry for long message, but you should consider my advice. Good luck Nairo!
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NairoMK
Super Smash Bros
I want to rearrange your guts
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I want to rearrange your guts. No, not with my throbbing cock, not even in a sexual or physical manner. I want to drink kombucha and properly alkalinized water with you. Long walks at sunset to Whole Foods, we will manifest good energy through plentiful probiotics and good health
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Not your naked body
AITA for not telling my wife about all the hitchhikers I killed in the 70s?
Back when I (68M) was a young and dumb twenty-something, I spent a few carefree years in Southern California raping, torturing, and murdering hitchhikers. I don't want any judgement from SJWs about this, please, if you didn't live in Cali in the 1970s, you wouldn't understand. It was just what we did back in those days. Eventually I grew up, got married, had three beautiful kids, and was content to just get off to my trophies and polaroids, and maybe kill the occasional drifter on special occasions.
The other day, my wife (37F) found the hidden panel in my basement wall where I keep all the old memories, and she went ballistic. I tried to calm her down, explained that, firstly, they were all dudes, so she shouldn't exactly be getting jealous. Second, they're all dead, so it's not like she's going to have to worry about me leaving her for any of them. Third, there were like three or four other guys doing the same thing around then, and they took the credit for most of my kills. I was very careful, covered my tracks, rarely finished inside them. I don't know why she's got her knickers in such a twist.
Quite frankly, I'm feeling really hurt about the whole thing. We've been together for nearly thirty years, and she's thinking about leaving me over something like this? Maybe I should have been more honest, but I was raised to see this as men's business, not something you involve your old lady in.
Am I the asshole?
AITA
Halloween Mercy
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๐Guys๐, Iโm ๐ฒshaking๐ฒ. Iโm fucking๐ฒ shaking๐ฒ. I never wanted to ๐๐๐๐breed ๐๐๐๐with anyone more than I want to with ๐๐ปHalloween ๐ปโ๏ธMercy.โ๏ธ๐๏ธ That ๐ฏperfect,๐ฏ โณcurvy โณ๐body.๐ Those ๐bountiful๐ ๐breasts๐. The ๐ชchild ๐ชbearing๐ hips๐ of a ๐ผ๏ธ๐literal goddess๐๐ผ๏ธ. It honestly fucking ๐ณ๐ณhurts๐ณ๐ณ knowing that Iโll neverโค๐
๐mate โค๐
๐with her, โฌpassโฌ my ๐genes๐ through her, and have her ๐birth๐ a set of ๐ช๐ฏperfect offspring.๐ฏ๐ช Iโd do fucking๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฐ ANYTHING ๐ฐ๐ฐ
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Emoji Pasta
Overwatch
It's EXAM WEEK
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It's EXAM WEEK ๐ค๐ค and it's TIME โฑโฑ to WHIP OUT ๐ฏ๐ฏ your EDUCATION ERECTIONS ๐๐๐๐ and FUCK THESE FINALS ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐๐. That's RIGHT, get READY to BOOTYCALL ๐๐ your SLUTTY STUDY BUDDIES ๐๐ and HIT ๐๐ the BOOKS ๐๐๐till your BRAIN ๐ง ๐ง is RUBBED RAW ๐ซ๐ซ and your PEN ๐๐is DRY ๐ต๐ต. So let's put the CUM in CUMULATIVE ๐ฆ๐ฆ and do this THING ๐๐. Send this to 11 of the SKANKIEST ๐คค๐คค SCHOLARS you know or you will LITERALLY get F'D! ๐ฑ๐ฑ
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