[Copypasta] Wallstreetbet's Christmas break

Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas

HODL

πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ•πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Thats why this place is so special.

Listen 5 years ago I wanted to get into investing. I came to this sub to get some advice. One guy helped me with a stock I could invest in. It was dipping for a few days and I kept asking what I should do and he said hold. Kept quoting Warren buffet On the third day I panicked and told him I had to sell. He sent me a video and told me to watch it before I sold. It was a guy getting railed by jpow. I lost 400 dollars that day but it taught me some lessons. Now look at me. Been investing for over 3 years now. I was even on this gme thing. Yeah I could of made 8x the profits instead of 4 but I consider that my own fault. But through this great sub and everything I have learned, I reinvested my profits and as of today I am down 5 grand. Thats why this place is so special.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Fuck you all, I’m never listening to this sub again.

Yesterday I said we’d see a rally like we’ve never seen before I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts. My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully I’ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked. Fuck you all. I’m only listening to myself now. You’re all retarded and so am I for listening to you. Edit: not sure why some of you degens think I’m blaming you. Of course it’s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards See you tomorrow
March 2022

WallStreetBets

GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares theyβ€˜re trading/Iβ€˜m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I donβ€˜t exactly know whatβ€˜s going on, itβ€˜s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is β€žtoo irrelevant for the big stock marketβ€œ. They are β€žaware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GMEβ€œ. They acted as if GME was some β€žchildish financial playgroundβ€œ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how β€žGME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safeβ€œ. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Jack Ma goes missing

Jack Ma is making poop emoji pillows in a factory now 11 hours a day and you guys are making jokes about him πŸ˜”
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Text-to-Speech Playing