Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Apple announces an EV program
Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.
WallStreetBets
HODL
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
πππππππππ
WallStreetBets
I am financially ruined
I came here for the first time and in 3 minutes made the decision to put way more than I can afford into PLTR calls. Iβm too retarded and now I literally dont know what to do I am financially ruined and I canβt even remember what I read that said this pltr thing was a good move. Fml
WallStreetBets
I couldnβt tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do
I couldnβt tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do or even what the ticker stands for...but you better believe Iβm jacked to the mfβing tits in every single meme stonk that you crayon eaters have been pumping. CHOO CHOO MFβER.
WallStreetBets
Darth Bearish the Regarded
Did you ever hear the tragedy of "Darth Bearish the Regarded"?
I thought not. Itβs not a story any bull would tell you.
Itβs an ancient Bear legend.
Darth Bearish was a Dark Lord of the Bears, so well capitalized and so regarded he could use Leverage to influence gamma to create profits⦠He had such a knowledge of the dark side of Leverage that he could even keep other traders he cared about from being margin called.
But the dark side of Leverage is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be... unnatural. He became so bearish⦠the only thing he was afraid of was losing his positions, which eventually, of course, he did.
Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice reversed his positions in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from bankruptcy, but not himself!