I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
I used to be a real ad
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Apparently I "ruined" Thanksgiving dinner
twitchquotes:
Apparently I "ruined" Thanksgiving dinner by bringing my girlfriend Asuka. My mum didn't care that she was a giat robot pilot, tasked with protecting the world after the Second Impact. She insisted that Asuka isn't real and now we're banned from the local country club. Anyways, my mum says if I don't bring a "real" girl to our Christmas dinner I'm going to get kicked out of the house!!! Asuka sets the bar pretty high but if you think you can compete with her please message me 
twitch chat
Weebs
ABORTION TEST
twitchquotes:
ABORTION TEST If the arms ⊿?⊾ touch the coat hanger, you are ARRESTED ⎝ 
⎠
twitch chat
The Story of Kanye West
After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest. Then to school to take his Kanye Test. He forgot to brush his teeth. Did he run out of Kanye Crest? His neighbor stole it, what a Kanye Pest. He then puts on some axe for some Kanye zest and goes to the bar puffing out his Kanye chest. Gets drunk into a Kanye mess and goes home to the the Kanye West part of town. He realized his life was a wreck, and was feeling a little Kanye depressed. “My life sucks he Kanye digressed. He decided to get some Italian to he flew to Kanye Trieste. He got some pasta and started to Kanye digest. You should get some Kanye rest his wife Kanye pressed. Instead he went to a Kanye fest. He then realized he needed to go to Dallas for his competition, so he went to the airport and hopped on Kanye southwest, got some Kanye rest, and the next morning was feeling ready for his Kanye contest. Or at least he Kanye guessed. On the day of the competition he was feeling a little Kanye stressed. But in the end the judges were Kanye impressed. For his performance he was awarded with the Kanye chest, clearly identified with the Kanye crest. There ends the story of Kanye West.
Kanye West
Kripp
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Kripp
Spider
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⡙⢿⣿⣦⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡉⠛⠓⠢⡈⢿⡿⠁⣸⣿⡿⠿⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣍⣙⡋⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠘⠁⠄⠴⠚⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡴⠖⠒⠄⠁⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⣩⣴⣶⣿⣿⣶⡞⠉⣠⣇⠄⣿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠲⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣌⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⣿⣿⣿⡏⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿