[Copypasta] I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Kripp please pet your cat

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian, Leon Tidewellow here, CEO of PETA. My sources tell me that you haven't pet your cat in over 3 years, and thats a little too long. I'll give you 5 minutes, if you don't pet the cat then you WILL be brofisted. Have a nice day!.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Papparrian is disappointed in Kripparrian

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Papparrian. WHAT THE FUCK? Why are you playing a MOBA? I remember when you were a young boy and you wouldn't dare touch that shit. I'm dissapointed in you son. Rip in pepperonis
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

My name is Dennis Pasterino

twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hey Kripp. it's Chris from Overwolf

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. it's Chris from Overwolf. We're sorry to say we have to terminate your sponsor contract due to the fact that you consistently keep losing, even though you're using decks drafted through the HearthArena app. You are simply bringing us too much unneeded bad reputation, so we figure we'd just channel the funds we spend on you on a better player like Amaz. Sorry for this, and good luck in the future.
twitch chat
September 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single

Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
January 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing