So I’m an AMC shareholder, which means I own some of the business. Because the stock kept getting halted today I decided to go to my local AMC and support the stock by buying some concessions. I went up to the stand and told the casher (his nametag said Melvin) that I was a shareholder and wanted to support the business. He looked excited and told me to close my eyes and hold out my hand for a surprise shareholder treat. I can’t believe it, but he just covered my hands in liquid butter! Now I’m typing this at home and cant get it off my hands, and my keyboard is all greasy typing this, What do I do?
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
WSB Choose your fighter
Choose your fighter
Alex Magikarp 🐟
Elon TechnoCuckLord 🤖+🤴
Jeff Divorcedzos 💔
Salmonella 🐔 Nutella 🍫
Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman 🤡
Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya 🍈
Ryan Cocken your butthole 🥒💦 👉👌😳
🥒 Z 🥒 U 🥒 C 🥒 C 🥒
Tim 🍎 Bottom 🅱️ENIS
Jack Ma MIA 🤷♂️
Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the 🐻s' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods 🙏✝️
WallStreetBets
My idiot boyfriend spent my college fund on dog coins how do I get it back???
He talked me into spending the $8500 I have on dog coins because something was supposed to happen yesterday which would have given us more money?? but it didn't actually happen or got canceled or something I don't really know or understand how it works but I went to the dog coin site to withdraw my money and there is only about $6700 of it there, where is the rest of it? I tried looking at the faq but don't really get it
WallStreetBets
Classic
HODL
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌘🌑🌒🌕🌑🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌓🌕🌑🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌖🌕🌔🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌘🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
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🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑
🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌑🌕🌗🌑
🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌖🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌓🌕🌕🌕🌖🌑🌑
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🌑🌑🌕🌖🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
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🌑🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌑
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🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
WallStreetBets
I just fired out why they call them Brokers
I just figured out why they call them ‘Brokers’
WallStreetBets
Daily stock prayer
Time for our daily prayer:
Our calls, Who art in PLTR,
Perfect be Thy Timing.
Thy tendies come.
Thy expirations be done,
on earth as it is in Wall Street.
Give us this day our daily Lambos.
And forgive us of our puts,
as we forgive those who buy puts against us.
And lead us not into Debt,
but deliver us unto tendies. Amen