[Copypasta] Red futures :(

Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbetsOGs/comments/lp6i1r/what_are_your_moves_tomorrow_february_22_2021/gob8p5c/
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Fuck you all, Iā€™m never listening to this sub again.

Yesterday I said weā€™d see a rally like weā€™ve never seen before I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts. My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully Iā€™ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked. Fuck you all. Iā€™m only listening to myself now. Youā€™re all retarded and so am I for listening to you. Edit: not sure why some of you degens think Iā€™m blaming you. Of course itā€™s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards See you tomorrow
March 2022

WallStreetBets

Iā€™m a simple guy

Iā€™m a simple guy. I donā€™t know about all these fancy ā€œfinancial instrumentsā€ or ā€œmarket dynamicsā€ or ā€œwhere the clit is.ā€ I like the stock, I buy the stock.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

bears are fuk

I hate people saying bears are fuk or bulls are fuk. Stop saying that. It's very rude. Just say bears are fuk
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

No name calling

I just had a conversation w a šŸ‚ that didnt resort to name calling... We just spoke our peace and wished ourselves good luck and now i dint know what to do with myself. I think im going to go back and call him a bitch.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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