[Copypasta] My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

Classic

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Troll face

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November 2014

Classic

Please refrain from likening us to plebeians

twitchquotes: Twitch streamers and their subscribers define us (not subscribed audience) as members of a lower social class, plebs as they call it. I find it inappropriate to compare us with ancient Rome's lowest class as there is nothing ignominious to being a member of the proletariat. Also their living standards were significantly inferior to ours (e.g. health, education) so the comparison is unsound. In the future, please refrain from likening us to plebeians because descriminating due to economic and social status like that is reprehensible in our modern society.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

plebs vs subs

do u think that yoshi gets embarrassed

do u think that yoshi gets embarrassed when he poos out eggs in front of mario??? sorry if this ofends anyone but i thought it was a funny thing haha. and i would like to know if any of you have any pics of yoshi pooping an egg while he looks nervous or embarrassed i just want to see it for a few laughs haha. another thing i am wondering is what do you think the eggs smell like haha im just curious for laughs haha i would like to smell them
July 2019

Super Smash Bros

Classic

Traveled the entire galaxy trying to find out who asked

β €β €β €β €β €β €.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€οΎŸ .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€βœ¦ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€,γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. γ€€γ€€βœ¦β €γ€€β€‚β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€,γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ β €γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β €γ€€γ€€, β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€β €γ€€γ€€γ€€β €.γ€€ Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€β €γ€€β €β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€,γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. . β €γ€€γ€€β €β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β €βœ¦β €γ€€ . .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€β € . Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€οΎŸγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. .⠀  ⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀, *γ€€γ€€β €. .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β €βœ¦ Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ .β €γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. βœ¦β €γ€€β€‚β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€,γ€€γ€€β€ˆβ€Šβ€Šβ€Š β €γ€€γ€€ .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€β €γ€€γ€€γ€€. Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€β €γ€€β €β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€, .γ€€γ€€γ€€ β €β€ˆγ€€γ€€β€‚β€‚β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. Traveled the entire galaxy trying to find out who askedβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β €β €β €βœ¦ β € β €γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β €β €β €β €β €* β €β €β €.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €βœ¦β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β € β €β €β €β €β €β €.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€οΎŸ .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.
January 2021

Classic

Who Asked?

Pickpocket hot tip

twitchquotes: Hot tip: When someone yells pickpocket start searching for your wallet in the groin area and exclaim 'Thank God my wallet is safely tucked between my testicles'. The pickpocket will see this and assume that the wallet is there. These people usually have very supple and delicate hands so when they try to take your wallet you will instead get a pleasant fondling to your genital area.
twitch chat
January 2019

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing