[Copypasta] My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Pretending I'm Ahri

twitchquotes: Sometimes I like to put 9 towels into my anus and pretend I'm Ahri. Please no coperino and pasra macaroni, thank you! Sorry for bad England, I walk many Egyption miles to come watch.
twitch chat
December 2018

Classic

League of Legends

Greggnog

First off: I am not joking. I wish I was joking. I've been with my wonderful boyfriend Greg for over 4 years now, and this Christmas was our third spent together. He's so much fun to be around, handsome, charming, and our sex life is great. Except for one small problem. Every year now starting in December he starts referring to his cum as "Greggnog." When I first heard him say this, it was in the context of a joke, so I laughed, and then I forgot about it. A few days after this, we're exchanging some spicy texts before he gets home from work he says to me, in all seriousness, "I can't wait to pour Greggnog all over your face." I could not believe he just said that to me, but I didn't know what else to do at the time but go along with it. Fast forward to this December. This phrase re-enters his vocabulary at the same time every year. It makes me cringe beyond belief, but until this year he used it sparingly enough for me to just be able to laugh and say "shut the fuck up." I'm sure that 2020 has done at least some irreparable psychic damage to all people, but unfortunately, for my boyfriend, this has manifested in the form of him referring to his cum as "Greggnog" non-stop. This month he has been using the term almost exclusively, in all contexts, and it is driving me batshit insane. I sat him down to talk last week, and I asked him very clearly and directly to stop. At the time, he said he would, and it did slow down for a few days, but it is now four days after Christmas and he's back at it again with no end in sight. He absolutely means the world to me, and I saw myself spending the rest of my life with him, but I have serious doubts now whether or not I can if every Christmas is going to be like this. So please, reddit, what do I do to make this stop for good?
December 2020

Classic

Everything points to Amogus

πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΏπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘‰πŸ½πŸ‘‡πŸΌπŸ‘‡πŸΌπŸ‘‡πŸΌπŸ‘‡πŸΌπŸ‘‡πŸΌπŸ‘ˆπŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘‰πŸ½πŸ‘‰πŸΌπŸ‘‡πŸ»πŸ‘‡πŸ»πŸ‘‡πŸ»πŸ‘ˆπŸΌπŸ‘ˆπŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘‰πŸ½πŸ‘‰πŸΌπŸ‘‰πŸ» ࢞ πŸ‘ˆπŸ»πŸ‘ˆπŸΌπŸ‘ˆπŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘‰πŸ½πŸ‘‰πŸΌπŸ‘†πŸ»πŸ‘†πŸ»πŸ‘†πŸ»πŸ‘ˆπŸΌπŸ‘ˆπŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘‰πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸΌπŸ‘†πŸΌπŸ‘†πŸΌπŸ‘†πŸΌπŸ‘†πŸΌπŸ‘ˆπŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘‰πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘†πŸ½πŸ‘ˆπŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘†πŸΎπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ πŸ‘‰πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘†πŸΏπŸ‘ˆπŸΏ
March 2022

Among Us / Amogus

Classic

Kog'Maw's passive

twitchquotes: Hi Imaqtpie. I noticed that in your games you utilize Kog’Maws passive A LOT, but when I watch LCS players I see them go an ENTIRE teamfight without using their passive even ONCE. Are they playing the champion to its full potential or are you?
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Classic

League of Legends

FeelsBadMan pyramid

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan Only a true failure can fail to build a pyramid FeelsBadMan FeelsBadMan May as well not even bother FeelsBadMan FeelsBadMan FeelsBadMan And Still my pyramid sucks
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing