[Copypasta] In Korea, heart surgeon

Number one. Steady hand. One day, Kim Jong Un need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Kim Jong Un die! SSD very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret. I kill Kim Jong Un on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
April 2021

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas

Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards

twitchquotes: Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards. It's just so positive and generous. Practically costs nothing at all at one mana you drop him on the board and that chill ass mofo gives you a spell to use later in the game. And you also get this adorable little 1/1 can ping things but usually is too harmless to be removed. But more than the BB is just so positive. It comes on the board like "do you want to cast a spell?" and I'm like "yeah BB i do want to cast a spell let's do this shit" and when he attacks he's like "SPELLS ARE FUN" and I'm like "yeah they are SO FUN." He doesn't say some bullshit macho shit like "I will destroy you" he's just like "nah spells are fun." And it looks so happy. I mean this is an inanimate object literally brought to life by magic. It understands it's life is a temporary magical gift and the dude is just fucking loving it. I mean look at his face he's just so happy. I am literally never sad when babbling book is on board. IDK if he's gonna make it into the metagame or not but for now he (or she) a pretty chill card
twitch chat
December 2016

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Hearthstone

Naughty fun

guys why when a woman gets a vibrator, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when a guy orders a 240 Volt FuckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating ***, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, hes called a pervert?
April 2014

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Attention all Fortnite gamers

twitchquotes: Attention all Fortnite gamers: John Wick is in great danger and he needs your help to wipe out the squads in the Tilted Towers, but to do this he needs a golden scar and a couple of chug jugs. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three digits on the back, and the expiration month and year. But, you gotta be quick, so John Wick can secure the bag and achieve the epic Victory Royal!
twitch chat
November 2018

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Fortnite

This is the world we have wrought

twitchquotes: The year is 2129; humans can only communicate through increasingly garbled copy-pasta. A man approaches and says "ire: β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ 10 stroke dick ff β˜‘ EKT ☾ β˜† ΒΈ. ?" In confusion, I reply "AT ASCII ΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΊˆΰΌ½ΰΌ½οΎ‰οΎ‰ HA Κ™α΄ΚŸα΄€ ヽ༼ಒ_ β™Œ β›ΰΈ±βˆ—)β—ž TUCK F (β—‘β€Ώβ—‘βœΏ)". This is the world we have wrought.
twitch chat
October 2014

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A New Toucan Has Arrived

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January 2019

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Text-to-Speech Playing