[Copypasta] I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search” as they would say. By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving. I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes. During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up. Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.
April 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Infinite Cum Part 2

Your eyes slowly open. Crusty from months of wear from stray globs of semen and cosmic dust. You are in a room and you can no longer see your member, or rather, what was left of it. There are tubes leading away from your pelvis, pumping and pulsating. There is a glass window across from you and a person dressed in a white jacket. A woman. She looks up from her clipboard to see you are awake. At first she is uninterested, but then her eyes slam open and a beaming smile crosses her face. Her eyes filled with curiosity. “You’re awake!” She cries over the loudspeakers that you only just now notice embedded into the top corners of the room. “Where am I?” You ask, filled with fear and excitement. You thought you would never see a human again and you would be destined to suffer endlessly across the cosmos. “You are on Saturn. You crashed into it and due to it’s extreme mass you were able to stop. We picked you up because you may be the key to saving humanity for all eternity.” “How?” You ask as a smile begins to creep across your face, imagining that you could be an icon for humanity. “You have been addressed as the Cosmic Unknown Mass Semen Generator, or CUMS-G for short. The fault in reality that caused your affliction can be used for the good of humanity. By using the mass you produce we will never have to worry about energy again, as by converting your biomass into energy we have unlimited power for the rest of time. When the stars die and the cosmos sink into nothing, humanity will be able to continue thanks to you. The anomaly that created you is easily one of the greatest discoveries humanity has ever had, on par with the discovery of fire.” “Will I not die?” “You can’t die. You are immortal. You don’t even have a body and yet you continue to exist” … Hours later, she leaves to tell her superiors. They do not greet you. They exchange high-fives and party but they do not speak to you. Months pass. The cum accelerates. Then years. The cum accelerates. Then decades. The cum accelerates. Then centuries. The cum accelerates. Then eons. The cum accelerates. No one talks to you. You don’t even know if humanity is alive anymore or if they have left you to exist for the rest of eternity. The tubes around you have gotten far thicker and more high tech as the ferocity of your semen expulsion increased. Eventually the walls around you cave in. Only then do you see the truth. Their plan was flawed.
April 2022

Infinite Cum

Plane

⠀⠀⠀⣖⠲⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠉⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠹⡀⣠⢤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⠀⡧⢤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⢄⣹⣅⣜⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⢹⠚⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣀⠴⢒⣉⡹⣶⣤⣀⡉⠉⠒⠒⠒⠤⠤⣀⣀⣀⠇⠀⠀⢸⠠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠉⠒⠯⣟⣲⠦⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠒⠻⢥⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⣲⡬⠭⠿⢷⣦⣤⢄⣀⠀⠀⠚⠛⠛⠓⢦⡀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠤⠴⠚⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣉⡽⣕⣯⡉⠉⠉⠑⢒⣒⡾ ⠀⠀⣀⡠⠴⠒⠉⠉⠀⢀⣀⣀⠤⡤⢶⣶⣋⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀ ⣖⣉⣁⣠⠤⠶⡶⡶⢍⡉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠒⠯⠜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢦⣯⠇
February 2020

But I believe Tyler1 can save the world

twitchquotes: Long ago, the five positions lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Riot Balance Team attacked. Only the Alpha, master of all five positions, could stop them, but when the world needed him most, he got banned. Two years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Alpha, a Draven main named Tyler1, and although his Draven skills are great, he has a lot to learn before he’s ready to save anyone. But I believe Tyler1 can save the world...
twitch chat
October 2018

No girlfriend. No friends. No talents.

twitchquotes: 4Head No girlfriend 4Head No friends 4Head No talents 4Head Saturday night alone 4Head Wasting time on Twitch 4Head Watching a dead game 4Head Reading the chat more than the stream 4Head Spamming pastas brainlessly 4Head Must be me
twitch chat
September 2018

If you watch good anime, you're a real anime fan

twitchquotes: Imagine thinking as long as you watch anime, you're a anime fan, lol what a joke. There are levels to this, if you watch bad anime and have bad taste, you're not a real anime fan. If you watch good anime and have good taste like me, you're a real anime fan. Truth hurts. #anime
twitch chat
October 2020

Weebs

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