[Copypasta] Among Us is ruining my fucking life

I can't fucking take it any more. Among Us has singlehandedly ruined my life. The other day my teacher was teaching us Greek Mythology and he mentioned a pegasus and I immediately thought 'Pegasus? more like Mega Sus!!!!' and I've never wanted to kms more. I can't look at a vent without breaking down and fucking crying. I can't eat pasta without thinking 'IMPASTA??? THATS PRETTY SUS!!!!' Skit 4 by Kanye West. The lyrics ruined me. A Mongoose, or the 25th island of greece. The scientific name for pig. I can't fucking take it anymore. Please fucking end my suffering.
August 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Classic

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Among Us mini crewmate

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October 2020

Among Us / Amogus

EPICLY TROLLING MY CLASS WITH AMONG US!!!!

So today I trolled my class with Among Us in an epic way. We were doing a test and were putting numbers into the computer to log into the test. It reminded me of Among Us so I shouted, "IS THAT AN AMONG US REFERENCE?!?!" I then pointed at the kid next to me, who was wearing a red shirt, and yelled, "RED SUS! RED SUS! VOTE OUT RED HE'S SUS!" The teacher tried to pull me out of the classroom but I stabbed him with a pencil epic John Wick style! I proceeded to scream, "DEAD BODY REPORTED!" Then they EXPELLED me and it was kind of sus the way they did it. On my way out of the school I saw a vent so I grabbed the nearest kid and shoved him into the vent! I cracked his skull but it was just a joke so it's okay. My therapy starts tomorrow
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Among Us is love, Among Us is life

I was only nine years old. I loved Among us so much; I had all the merchandise and the skins. I played Among us every night before bed. Thanking Among us for hours of entertainment I've been given. "Among us is love," I say, "Among us is life." My dad hears me and calls me, "A retard." I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Among us. I call him, "Sus." He slaps me and sends me to bed. I am crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. I feel a warmth move towards me. I feel something touch me. It's the Crewmates. I am so happy. They whisper in my ear, "Are you the imposter?" They grab me with their hard-working crewmate hands and put me on my hands and knees. I'm ready. I spread my asscheeks for the crewmates. They penetrate my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for the Among us characters. I can feel my rectum tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against their force. I want to please the crewmates. They roar a mighty roar as they fill my butthole with their love. My dad walks in. The crewmates look him straight in the eye and say, "It is all sussed now." The Among us characters leave through my window. Among us is love, Among us is life.
June 2021

Among Us / Amogus

NSFW

Amogus 700 years in the future

Imagine, 700 years in the future, through some last vestige of the internet kept in an underground server, a notification miraculously appears on your device (which has been preserved in nuclear dust from the 5th world war). One night, an alien working a late shift at the museum of archeology notices the cracked screen suddenly light up, and upon it, one word arises from the battered code: Amogus. They do not know what this word means. They ponder it deeply. They scour the ancient tomes, desperate to understand its mystifying origin. It drives them mad. Is it a primeval cipher? The motto of a bygone civilization? A message from God? Night after night they study it by candlelight. They flip through pages in books so old, the slightest cough would turn the paper to a fine off-white powder. The answer is nowhere to be found. And then they are struck by a revelation: I was not meant to know this word. Its esoteric nature escapes my grasp for a reason. What if its meaning is too enlightening to bear? With this revelation comes anger. Spite. Despair. Why shouldn't I understand it?! What cosmic forces are there at play to keep me from such knowledge?! In a fit of desperate rage, they shatter your device against a wall and exclaim, arms raised to the heavens: "This is literally 1984!" Silence... Their pleas are unanswered. Sadly, in the end, their inability to unlock the word's meaning drives them to suicide. Its secrets are never known. So I ask you this: is it better to die having never understood the true mind-bending nature of Amogus, or to be driven mad by the little spaceman in his blood-red suit? If you knew enlightenment would render you incapable of living on this mortal earth without making daily references to a game of space mafia, would you accept it? With knowledge comes power, but also endless suffering. Choose wisely, and be wary when standing at the edge of that great abyss we call "the Truth," lest you fall too deep.
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Trolling My Office With Among Us PART 8 (GRAND SERIES FINALE)

I was dashing around the office. Everyone looked at me weird. I was screaming, "SUS! SUS! AMOGUS!" Everyone started chanting with me. "SUS! SUS! AMOGUS! AMONG SUS! WHEN THE IMPOSTER IS SUS!" We all did the Among Us beatbox in unison. It was beautiful. Like a horse waving its mane in the air on a bright and pretty day. But suddenly I noticed; one of the kids wasn't doing the Among Drip beatbox! So I ran over to her. "Hey kid," I said, "Stop being an asparagus or whatever your dumb star signs are and be not sussy with us!" She looked at me weird and said "Whatever, old man." That was so disrespectful and SUS of her! So I put my hands around her neck and twisted her head off "Like in that one kill animation in Among Us." Everyone looked at me in horror, even the ones who were Among Beatboxing with me! Everyone was looking at me like I had just sexually abused a Syrian 4 year old refugee (which I had done before.) I said "What?" when suddenly the elevator opened. It was the CEO of Pepsi-co! I noticed the Pepsi pin on her shirt and said "When the Pepsi is sus!" because it reminded me of the Among Us crewmate .I did the sussy Among Us beatbox. You know the one? It goes; ding ding ding ding ding ding ding, ding ding ding! BM BM! You know the one! But, before I could finish it, I noticed; her boobs were big! I took my finger and poked her titty that was almost bursting out of her shirt. "Booba." I said. She had a face more horrified than anyone in the room, like before when everyone looked at me last week like I murdered Bosnian children. You remember that, right? She screamed "SECURITY!" Two buff men with pecs almost as big as hers and clothes so tight you could see their 12-pack abs through the shirt tackled me. I said "That's a bit SUSSY!" (Like how the guy said it in the "STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US" rant. "You're not wholesome Keanu Chungus 100 Fortnite bad TikTok cringe Minecraft & Reddit good." I said. I got out and kicked their nuts. Although they were big, (not as big as my magnum mega-cock, you know like the size of Danny Devito's?) they still cried when I kicked their nuts. "You fucking cracker-jacks! You're Tik-Tokers trying to invade Reddit!" I screamed. I dashed for the door but an alarm started blaring and steel barriers went down over the windows. I barely slid out of the door before the steel door closed under me. I heard the alarms blaring even from inside. I started running, running away trying to flee the scene. Not even half a mile away I saw a SWAT police car dash by me. It started to slow down, oh shit, they noticed me! I jumped into a nearby bush and hid, hoping he wouldn't see me. Quickly, a bunch of men fully armed with automatic rifles and heavy armor came out of the back, scoping the area around. "We can't let him get away!" I heard one of them yell. Were they talking about me? I didn't do anything sus, at least if murder, sexual harassment, and assault don't count as being sus. I stayed still, not even making a sound. A few minutes in, I heard my dickhole queef. It didn't make that much of a sound but I just barely saw out of the bush, the SWAT team start looking around. Shit. They heard my cock fart. I couldn't move as it would make too much noise. Eventually, after a while of looking, they just left. I was free. I quickly got out and ran, but making sure to run behind the bushes so I wouldn't be spotted. I eventually got into the main part of the city. The town wasn't all that big, but it was big enough for me to hide. I did it. I really did it. I had gotten away. Eventually, I made it far. Far out of town. I can't even tell Reddit where I am. It's too secret. I'm currently living a secret life in my inconspicuous location. But, this is the story of how I trolled my office. With Among Us.
April 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

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