I want to fuck Spongebob. I want to slide my semen hose into every dispersed crevice and hole of his ripe yellow dermis. I want him to crush my cock and balls against my will until theyโre just as pendulous and flabby as his succulent sponge-skin. I want him to forcefully suck me off with his moist yellow cavities as Iโm held down by Mr. Krabโs razor sharp sex-talons. If only he would role-play as Sigmabob Grindpants so I could grind my pathetic little cum drizzled fuck-sausage against his shorts, my life would be complete.
I used to be a real ad
More NSFW Copypastas
So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a trollface cosplay
So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing a trollface mask and black morph suit. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as your mother (after I have sexual intercourse with her) and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made me feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my morph suit. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Cover yourself in oil."
He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "You mad bro?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "We do a little trolling!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came.
His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'm still Trollface."
NSFW
๐HAPPY SPANKSGIVING๐ฆ
โผ๏ธITS๐ SPANKSGIVING ๐ BITCHESโผ๏ธOn this day ๐ many years ago ๐ฎ the SLUTTY ๐ PILGRIMS ๐ฉ sailed โต๏ธ across the ASSlantic ๐ HOEcean in a quest ๐to find ๐ more ๐ COCKS ๐ to SUCK! ๐
Together with the ๐ NAUGHTY ๐ NATIVES ๐น, they gathered ๐ซ around the dinner table ๐ฝ and had ๐ our nationโs very 1๏ธโฃst GANG BANG! ๐ฏโโ๏ธ๐ฏ๐ฏโโ๏ธ We honor ๐๐ป their ORGY ๐ฎ every year ๐ by giving THANKS ๐๐ผ to all ๐ฅฐ thatโs important โค๏ธ to us: Family ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ, Friends ๐ฌ, Freedom ๐บ๐ธ, and DICK! ๐๐ฝ๐
So grab your BUNS, ๐โ๐๐squeeze those BREASTS, ๐๐ฅ๐คฒ and shove a cornaCOPIOUS ๐ฝ๐ฝ amount of DICK ๐ ๐ฉ into that hungry ๐ฎ hungry HOLE! ๐ณ๐๐
Ladies ๐ฏโโ๏ธ, just like your ๐ฆ THOTSgiving ๐ฆ turkey, itโs time โฐ to throw your legs ๐คธ๐ผโโ๏ธin the air ๐คธ๐ผโโ๏ธand prepare to get โก๏ธ STUFFED ๐!
After dinner,๐ดitโs time ๐ฎ for CUMPKIN PIE!! ๐ฅง Show Daddy ๐จ๐ฝโ๐ฆณ how ๐๐ผ thankful ๐๐ผ you are and LICKK ๐ his WishBONE ๐ฆด until he gets as HARD ๐as PlyMOUTH rock โฐ and shoots ๐ฆ his HOMEADE GRAVY ๐ฅฃ! ๐
Midnight ๐ starts ๐ BLACK โฌ๏ธ FRIDAY ๐ so send ๐ค this to ๐ THOTS ๐๐ปโโ๏ธyou are thankful ๐๐ผ for! If you get 0๏ธโฃ back, sail ๐ to England ๐๐ป๐คฎ If you get 5๏ธโฃ back, youโll be getting your corn ๐ฝ CREAMED ๐๐ฅฐ. Get ๐ back or more, and the ๐ BIGGEST, ๐ GIRTHIEST, BLACKโซ๏ธ FRIDAY ๐ COCK ๐ฑ is CUMMING ๐ฆYOUR WAY AT MIDNIGHT ๐๐๐๐๐๐
Emoji Pasta
Holiday Emoji
Thanksgiving
NSFW
Holiday
Muscular lenny
Hydra cock
I used to work at an abortion clinic
I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed:
โข โ A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight
โข โ A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor
โข โ They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name)
โข โ One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns
โข โ The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man
โข โ The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life"
โข โ The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos
โข โ The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy)
โข โ During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free