[Copypasta] Who’s Joe? Joe Momma

"Who’s joe?" a distant voice asks. Instantly everyone nearby hears the sound of 1,000s of bricks rapidly shuffling towards his location. The earth itself seemed to cry out in agony, until finally the ground itself split open and a horrific creature crawled from the ground, covered in mucus and tar. ”Joe Momma…” the creature whispered. The man cried out in pain as he disintegrated into dust, and the whole world fell silent in fear. "I did a little trolling." the wretched creature remarked before burrowing back into the earth.
September 2021

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
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Dicks are so cute omg

twitchquotes: Dicks are so cute omg(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) when you hold one in your hand and it starts twitching its like its nuzzling you(/ω\) or when they perk up and look at you like" owo nya? :3c" hehe ~ penis-kun is happy to see me!!(^ワ^)
twitch chat
March 2018

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Grammarly ad script

Writing's not easy. That's why Grammarly can help. This sentence is grammatically correct, but it's wordy, and hard to read. It undermines the writer's message and the word choice is bland. Grammarly's cutting edge technology helps you craft compelling, understandable writing that makes an impact on your reader. Much better. Are you ready to give it a try? Installation is simple and free. Visit Grammarly.com today!
November 2020

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Moon emoji blob

🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🎩🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑🌒🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌓🌕 🌕🌕🌖🌑👁🌑👁🌓🌕 🌕🌕🌗🌑🌑👄🌑🌔🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌒🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🎀🌓🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌔🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌔🍆🌑🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌖🌒🌕🌗🌒🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌗🌓🌕🌗🌓🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌘🌔🌕🌗🌓🌕🌕🌕 🌕👠🌕🌕🌕👠🌕🌕🌕
February 2021

Classic

YUGIOH KEEPS INTERRUPTING MY AD MARATHON

twitchquotes: 📞 📞 BabyRage HELLO TWITCH? 📞 BabyRage THIS YUGIOH THINGY 📞 BabyRage KEEPS INTERRUPTING 📞 BabyRage MY AD MARATHON 📞 BabyRage
twitch chat
October 2017
TwitchPresents

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YuGiOh Ad Marathon

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink. "Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave. Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette. "Got a spare?" she asks. "What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles. "Conversation with me, duh." I laugh. "What's so funny?" she protests. "Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?" "You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter. "What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask. "Teaching, I think." "And if I was your student, what would I be learning?" "Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?" "Bermuda," I say. "Oh wow. That's lovely." "It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking." "What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires. "I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
January 2021

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing