PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Baconator Jr. really has my boyhood trembling
twitchquotes:
Christ Almighty, the Baconator Jr. really has my boyhood trembling. The crisp, Smokey bacon atop that seductive, square beef patty. What is there not to adore? And not to mention the smooth, melted cheese, and paired with fries and a frosty, you’ll be soaking through your chef’s apron in no time. Truly a masterpiece. A steamy, moist, delicious masterpiece.
twitch chat
NairoMK
End Stream
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣤⣤⡀⣠⠀⠀⣠⣀⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⢠⣿⡇⢀⣿⠀⣿⠀⢻⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠷⠶⠀⣼⠛⣧⣸⡇⢸⡏⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡏⠀⠀⢠⡟⠀⣿⣿⠀⣿⠁⣰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠺⠷⠶⠂⠸⠃⠀⠘⠃⠘⠿⠞⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢀⣤⣄⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣠⣤⣤⣀⠀⣠⣤⣤⣤⠀⠀⣠⡄⠀⢀⡄⠀⠀⣠⡀
⠀⢠⡟⠁⣿⠀⠀⣼⠁⠀⢠⡟⠈⣿⠂⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⣰⢿⡇⠀⣼⣷⠀⣰⣿⠁
⠀⠘⠷⣦⡀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⣼⣧⡴⠏⢀⣿⠶⠶⠀⣰⠏⢸⡇⢠⡿⣿⣴⢿⡏⠀
⢠⡆⠀⣼⠇⠀⣼⠃⠀⢠⡿⠸⣧⠀⣸⡇⠀⠀⣰⠟⠛⣻⡇⣼⠇⠿⠃⣿⠁⠀
⠈⠷⠾⠋⠀⠀⠟⠀⠀⠸⠃⠀⠿⠀⠿⠶⠶⠰⠟⠀⠀⠻⠀⠟⠀⠀⠘⠏⠀⠀
Blue Lives Matter (Smurfs)
blue people don't exist. this is offensive. i have never in my life met a blue person. SMURFS ARENT REAL GUYS. IM TIRED OF SEEING THIS BLUE LIVES MATTER, SMURFS ARE NOT REAL THERE ARE NO BLUE PEOPLE. and even if they were real, they do not matter. i hate smurfs. theyre ugly and short. i could step on them. they have big noses. i just want to pick them up and bite their heads like laffy taffy. DO NOT STAN BLUE LIVES
We subbed because we have cash, non-subs are trash
twitchquotes:
Hey you poor, underaged trash. You know what the symbol next to my name means? Means I am sub. Means im VIP. Means I got cash. What you got? You got sh!t. You poor non-sub trash ought to pay me and my sub-bros some respect. We subbed because we have cash. Real life jobs, real life credit
twitch chat
Kripp
A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, Mike Morhaime, President of Blizzard Entertainment here. I notice you're playing one of our older games. I have to warn you, the games we made in that era weren't casual-friendly. A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitch chat
Kripp