PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
THE WRONG DONGERHOOD
twitchquotes:
༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ YOU CAME TO THE WRONG DONGERHOOD ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽
twitch chat
Classic
Why is Jake even a meme?
twitchquotes:
Why is Jake even a meme? Are really so inconsiderate and stupid so as to think that its funny? You just post it like its some kind of joke, when in reality, Jake is a serious player at the top of his game, and deserves your respect. For this reason, I refuse to spam J 
KE
KE
twitch chat
Sodapoppin Tanner from Highschool
twitchquotes:
So you're going by "Sodapoppin" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Tanner from Highschool. Remember me? Me and the guys used to give you a hard time in school. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Sarah the girl you had a crush on? Yeah we're married now. I make over 200k a year and drive a mustang GT. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic
twitch chat
sodapoppin
Tanner from High School
NA COMING THROUGH
twitchquotes:
NA COMING THROUGH ♿ GO TO SCHOOL RISK LIFE ♿ 10 IQ PRESIDENT ♿ GETTING MY SISTER PREGNANT ♿ WALL ♿ THINK THEY SAVED WORLD WAR ♿ NA EDUCATION ♿ GOVERNMENT SO BAD HAD TO SHUT DOWN
twitch chat
EU vs NA
I sexually Identify as an the sun
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as an the sun. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of slamming hydrogen isotopes into each other to make helium & light and send it throught the galaxy. People say to me that a person being a star is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon inflate me with hydrogen and raise my temperature to over 6000 °C. From now on I want you guys to call me “Sol” and respect my right to give you vitamin D and probably sunburns. If you can’t accept me you’re a fusionphobe and need to check your astral privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat