[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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I sexually identify as a single Pringle

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a single, Pringle, ready to mingle. Ever since I was a potato I dreamed of being thin sliced, covered in disgusting oil then heated in a medium oven until reaching climax at the micro second of golden-browness. People bully me, and say things like "what the fuck, you aren't a Pringle", but I know deep down they are just jealous of my inner beauty.
twitch chat
March 2015

I sexually Identify as

DMCA is here guys

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠁⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠻⠟⠛⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ DMCA is here guys
ascii art
June 2020

Kurumx big brain

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⡙⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣍⡙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣍⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣧⢻ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡿⡿⣿⢸ ⣿⣿⣯⢰⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⠛⠻⠻⠻⢿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣨ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣭⡈⠙⠻⣿⣿⡟⣩⣭⡈⠙⠈⣀⣤⣤⠄⠄⣀⣴⡦⣨⢻ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⡿⠉⢻⡆⢸⣴⣦⢸⡿⠉⢻⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⡛⠴⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣦⡛⠴⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢵⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠓⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡥⣬⣿⣿⠋⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠁⠄⠄⣊⣊⣐⣀⠄⢹⣿⣿⠿⢣⣲⣴⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⣍⣭⣿⣿⡟⠈⠁⢲⣡⡤⡙⢾⢿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠈⠿⠟⠟⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣲⣿⣿⣿⡻⢿⣿
ascii art
March 2021
Kurumx

Teamfight Tactics

I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke

I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke. Ever since I was a child, I've dreamed of flippantly dismissing any concepts or discussions regarding gender that don't fit in with what I learned in 8th grade bio. People say to me that this joke hasn't been funny since 2014 and please at least come up with a new one, but I don't care, I'm hilarious. I'm having a plastic surgeon install Ctrl, C, and V keys on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "epic kek dank meme trannies owned with facts and logic" and respect my right to shit up social media. If you can't accept me you're a memeophobe and need to check your ability-to-critically-think privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
March 2021

I sexually Identify as

Ben Shapiro owns another Libtard

Are you a left or right wing?!”, the dark ominous figure booms. I know it’s over. “I-I’m a d-democr—“ Instantly I lose all bodily functions. I collapse to the floor, screaming in agony, spasming. The great Ben Shapiro stands over my lifeless body. “Libtard has been owned.”
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

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