[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Riding the chat elevator

twitchquotes: ( ͑↑ ΝœΚ– ͑↑) Riding the chat elevator all the way to Kripp ( ͑↑ ΝœΚ– ͑↑)
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

if you copy this message im reporting you

twitchquotes: wow, i log on to twitch tv to chat with people and to watch a good streamer, then you guys fking spam this chat with your dumb kappas and dumb sht memes that are not even close to funny. i dont even giggle from your shtty jokes. fk you and if you fking copy this message im reporting each one of you. you all think your fking funny
twitch chat
March 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

salty

Yuumi isn’t so great?

twitchquotes: Yuumi isn’t so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a champion with such skill expression and movement options in League? Yuumi puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a chamption with her skill and options in the game again. Riven breaks the game. Vladimir breaks the game. Yuumi breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.
twitch chat
May 2019

League of Legends

Anime girl

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–β–€β–β–€β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–Œβ–β–€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–’β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–“β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–Œβ–’β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–’β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œ
November 2014

Weebs

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
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