[Copypasta] I hate taking shits

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks. TL;DR I hate shitting
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

k3soju it's a neighth

soju ponders with the idea of slamming a cav spat. Hovering his chain over his spatula while he contemplates. Suddenly, he slips - accidentally slamming the cav spat ON HIMSELF. Twitch chat watch as soju twists and morphs into a horse live on stream. He stares into the camera... "it's a neighth"
July 2022
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce

gf is prego we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital she's still bleeding everywhere by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything he takes one look at ther and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do" "WHY THE FUCK NOT???" "we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
February 2021

Classic

HODL

πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ•πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘
February 2021

WallStreetBets

boatyVV

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September 2018

Angry Bee

twitchquotes: β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ™β ›β ›β ‰β ‰β ‰β ™β ›β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ ⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ β£Ώβ Ÿβ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’ β£€β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ’»β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ ⠦⣀⑀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣢⣀⣀⣀⣢⣢⣦⣿⣷⣀⣀⑀⠀⠀⠀⠀Ⓕ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ β‘„β ™β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Άβ£€β‘Ύβ£«β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ Ÿβ ‹β ‰β ‰β €β €β ˆβ ‰β ‰β ™β ²β’€β£€β €β ™β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ‘€β’Έβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ£«β£Ύβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ ‰β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ‘β’¦β‘€β ™β£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ‘‡β’ˆβ‘Ώβ’‘β£Ώβ£Ώβ β €β €β’€β£€β£Άβ£¦β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β Ήβ‘„β ˆβ£Ώ β£Ώβ‘‡β’Έβ‘‡β£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β €β €β €β ˜β »β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£¦β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β‘„β ˆ β£Ώβ‘€β’Έβ‘‡β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ »β£Ÿβ’³β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β£΄β‘Άβ’’β’°β € β£Ώβ£‡β ˆβ’·β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ύβ£†β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ šβ β €β €β €β €β£ β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ·β Όβ ‡β ‚ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£¦β €β »β£Ώβ£§β‘˜β’†β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘„β£€β €β €β €β ™β ‹β β €β €β €β €β’° β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£„β ˆβ »β£·β£Œβ’·β£€β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β „ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⑄⒰⣿⣿⣷⣯⑛⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⑀⠔⠁⣀ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β£„β‘‰β ›β ‹β ™β »β ·β’Άβ£€β£€β£€β£„β£€β£€β£€β‘€β ¦β –β ‚β ˆβ£ β£΄β£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β£Άβ£€β£„β €β Ίβ Ώβ Ώβ Ÿβ ‹β β£€β£€β£΄β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ
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February 2020
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