I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
I used to be a real ad
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Twitch Chat containment solution
twitchquotes:
International efforts to contain the most toxic and dangerous internet dwellers have failed time and time again, until a secret organisation offered to build a prison for internet's worst scum. The project codenamed "Twitch Chat" pretending to be an addition to a livestreaming service has proven to be a very effective containment solution.
twitch chat
Birds
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⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⢟⣤⡙⢿⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣸⣿⣿
⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣷⣝⠿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⠟⣠⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻⡼⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣠⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻⡼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣝⢿
⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣝⢿⣿⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷
⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣷⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣍⠻
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⡀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⡀⢀⣠⠄⣠⣶⣶⣿⣿⡗⣠⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠶⠶⠶⠶⠾⠿⠁⢈⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡈⢉⣩⡭⠽⢛⣒⣒⣒⣈⣿⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣉⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿
its 3 am and i fucked up really bad
I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
mizkifS
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⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣶⣿⣿⣶⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣏⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣏⠄⢘⣿⣿⣿⡄⢘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⣼⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠄⠄⠄
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⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠈⠙⠛⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄
⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣠⣴⡾⠟⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄
⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠶⠶⠶⠶⠾⠛⠋⠉⠉⠁⠄⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄
⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⡛⠛⠃⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠛⢛⣋⣉⣁⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄
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When Cybrix buys a Pepperoni pizza
twitchquotes:
When Cybrix buys a Pepperoni pizza, its seen as a bit of greasy fun. BUT when Kripp orders a 420 GreaseMaster Pro 5000 garbage pizza pie with 6 different types of pepperoni, spiceified sauce with non-drip collection tray, together with optional built in Cheese crust, hes called Fattarrian
twitch chat
Kripp