Have you ever thought about how, to a horse, the world is basically Candyland? Like they're wandering down a trail and boom, there's just some thistles. And then to the left, a delicious tree. There's just food all over the ground everywhere. Horses seem pretty excited about it.
What happened to this ad? :(
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COCKtober emojipasta v3
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twitchquotes:
๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ โ I got him โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ 
โ๏ธปโปโโไธ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฆ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ ๓
โ๏ธปโปโโไธ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฆ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ โ โ โ โ โ โ ๐ฅ ๓
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Infinite Cum Part 2
Your eyes slowly open. Crusty from months of wear from stray globs of semen and cosmic dust. You are in a room and you can no longer see your member, or rather, what was left of it. There are tubes leading away from your pelvis, pumping and pulsating. There is a glass window across from you and a person dressed in a white jacket. A woman. She looks up from her clipboard to see you are awake. At first she is uninterested, but then her eyes slam open and a beaming smile crosses her face. Her eyes filled with curiosity.
โYouโre awake!โ She cries over the loudspeakers that you only just now notice embedded into the top corners of the room.
โWhere am I?โ You ask, filled with fear and excitement. You thought you would never see a human again and you would be destined to suffer endlessly across the cosmos.
โYou are on Saturn. You crashed into it and due to itโs extreme mass you were able to stop. We picked you up because you may be the key to saving humanity for all eternity.โ
โHow?โ You ask as a smile begins to creep across your face, imagining that you could be an icon for humanity.
โYou have been addressed as the Cosmic Unknown Mass Semen Generator, or CUMS-G for short. The fault in reality that caused your affliction can be used for the good of humanity.
By using the mass you produce we will never have to worry about energy again, as by converting your biomass into energy we have unlimited power for the rest of time. When the stars die and the cosmos sink into nothing, humanity will be able to continue thanks to you. The anomaly that created you is easily one of the greatest discoveries humanity has ever had, on par with the discovery of fire.โ
โWill I not die?โ
โYou canโt die. You are immortal. You donโt even have a body and yet you continue to existโ
โฆ
Hours later, she leaves to tell her superiors. They do not greet you. They exchange high-fives and party but they do not speak to you.
Months pass.
The cum accelerates.
Then years.
The cum accelerates.
Then decades.
The cum accelerates.
Then centuries.
The cum accelerates.
Then eons.
The cum accelerates.
No one talks to you. You donโt even know if humanity is alive anymore or if they have left you to exist for the rest of eternity.
The tubes around you have gotten far thicker and more high tech as the ferocity of your semen expulsion increased.
Eventually the walls around you cave in. Only then do you see the truth.
Their plan was flawed.
Infinite Cum
The sweat begins to form at qts brow
twitchquotes:
The sweat begins to form at qts brow. His fingers are clammy, his neckbeard ruffled. After dying yet again he sees the hope of getting challenger fade away. "oh my god i cant believe we didn't get that guy," he proclaims. This is the beginning of the end for imaqtpie.
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imaqtpie
League of Legends
Emoji move emoji review
twitchquotes:
A ๐ whole ๐ฆ town ๐ช of ๐ฆ beings, ๐ confined to ๐ฆ feeling ๐ one ๐ค emotion their ๐ entire ๐ life. ๐ค That ๐ could ๐ honestly ๐ be ๐ the ๐ focus of ๐ฆ an ๐น entire ๐ movie, ๐ฅ but ๐ in ๐ the ๐ emoji ๐ movie ๐ฅ that's ๐ฆ just ๐ the ๐ world ๐ they ๐ฅ live ๐
in, ๐ and ๐ yet ๐ these ๐ beings ๐ don't ๐ซ question ๐ฉ it ๐ฏ and ๐ carry ๐ on ๐ their ๐ lives ๐ด as ๐ normal... ๐ the ๐ emoji ๐ movie ๐ฅ takes ๐ a ๐ far ๐ more ๐ subtle ๐ approach ๐ meaning critics probably ๐ป didn't ๐ซ notice the ๐ strong ๐ช existential themes present ๐ฒ in ๐ the ๐ film upon ๐ฆ first ๐ viewing.
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