[Copypasta] To a horse, the world is basically Candyland

Have you ever thought about how, to a horse, the world is basically Candyland? Like they're wandering down a trail and boom, there's just some thistles. And then to the left, a delicious tree. There's just food all over the ground everywhere. Horses seem pretty excited about it.
April 2022
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More Copypastas

Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike? My friend is a developer at Blizzard and he invented Flamestrike. He has been getting spam letters in the mail threatening to "brofist" him. These spammers claim to be "insane" and "crazy" and "have exactly what they need to beat him." I am worried for him, please help. Thanks man.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Zhong Xina

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⢠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣦⣀⣾⣿⣟⣉⠉⠙⢛⡏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠚⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣗⣻⣿⣯⣥⣦⠄⣀⣾⡇⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣻⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣥⣾⣷⠶⠆⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠚⣿⣿⡻⠿⠿⠛⠙⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠂⠄⠄⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠿⠛⠉⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⣻⣿⣿⣧⣠⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠿⢿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⣿⡿⠃⢀⡠⠄⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Kripp with sunglasses

░░░░▄▄▓▀▀▀▀▀▀▓▓▓▓▓▓▄░░░ ░░▄▄▓▀▀░░░░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▀▓▄░ ░▐▓▒░▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▒▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▓ ░████████████▄█████████░ ░▐▓░█████████▄█████████ ░▐▓░░▀██████▀░▀██████▀░ ░▄░░░░░░░▒▒░▄▄▄▄▄▒▒▒▒▒▌ ░▀░░░░░▒▒▒▒▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▌ ░░▐░░░░░▒▓▓▀▀▓▓▓▓█▓▓▒▒▌ ░░░▒▒▒▒░▒░░░▒▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓▓░ ░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌░ ░▄▄▓▓▒▓▄▓▓▓▓██████▓▓▀▒▄
January 2015
Kripp

I sexually identify as a Minecraft creeper

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a Minecraft creeper. Ever since I was a child I dreamed of stalking people in the dead of the night, making an erotic hissing noise, and then spewing my particles all over them. People say to me that a person being a monster in a dying Swedish pixel game is impossible and I’m more autistic than a Fortnite default, but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a doctor fill me with gunpowder and implementing green and black pigments into my skin. From now on I want you guys to call me "Creepus Explodus” and respect my right to appear on retarded children's backpacks and sweaters. If you can’t accept me you’re a mob-phobe and need to check your entity privilege. Thank you all for being so understanding.
twitch chat
March 2019

I sexually Identify as

Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed

twitchquotes: Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed where a breathless Hafu is waiting. She takes hold of his hand and whispers, "It's ok, I broke up with Jake." He squeezes her hand, let's go, squeezes again, "You're the best female arena player...," Kripp says dejectedly, "But I made a vow to Rania to never love another woman." Hafu runs her hands lovingly down his cheek, "You're not cheating," she whispers, "I'm really Amaz."
twitch chat
August 2018
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing