[Copypasta] I hate the French language

I struggle to find the right words to describe just how much I hate the French language. I'm not racist but I think the world would really be a better place if all French speakers just stopped speaking French and learned a normal language. Nothing about this language remotely makes sense, or is even internally consistent. Why are there so many silent letters? Half the words have pronunciations which somewhat resemble their spelling, and the other half seems like French people just decided to add a bunch of letters so they can act like they're better than everyone else. The language seems like it's deliberately constructed to be as difficult to learn as possible. Why the hell do verbs have different conjugations for you, me, he/she, we, you(plural), and them? Even the English language doesn't have that many arbitrary conjugations. I made an honest attempt to learn French, I really did, but the language is just filled with bullshit rules for grammar and everything else. Whichever way you look at it, it's almost as if French is constructed to be as difficult to learn as possible. For real, English isn't my first language but I learned it just fine; trying to learn French after that feels like bashing my head against the wall. This is somewhat irrelevant, but I've heard that some French speakers who speak some English like to pretend they don't speak it when you talk to them. Why do you have to make life difficult for everyone, I'm not going to make fun of you for speaking English poorly. That's not even mentioning how metropolitan French has a superiority complex over other variations of French, all neutral observers will agree that they are equally shit. Also I've heard that some French speakers tend to discriminate against people who speak a local dialect of French, as if one version of a language is better than all others. Sure, the same thing happens with English, but at least the English language doesn't suck.
April 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

You will never be Japanese

You will never be Japanese. You have no ancestry, you have no citizenship, you have no skills that would make Japan ever want you. You are a shut-in self-hating white man twisted by delusions of mythical Japanese superiority and exposure to Japanese media into a disgusting mockery of nature’s perfection. All 'validation' you get from other people in this position couldn't be worse in making you believe that spending years of your life learning a globally useless language to a first-grader's level was a worthwhile use of your time, but one can't expect that an individual as pathetic as you will ever know the value of the youth you threw away in doing that. Actual Japanese are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of linguistic evolution have allowed natives to identify frauds from mannerisms and vocabulary alone. Even if your written text of self-hatred and attention begging akin to a stray dog's somehow passes as normal (it won't), any Japanese person will immediately cut all ties when they hear the voice and accent of someone who is not only a basic Japanese speaker at best, but worth no more than garbage in skills, accomplishments, and likeability. You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile and laugh to yourself believing that watching a content creator that you understand 20% of at best is somehow superior than watching your own kind, as you project your disgusting traits onto your entire kind. However, deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight, and you know that. You know that all you do now is have an entirely new linguistic medium in which to be ignored, and not even the exotic trait of being foreign makes up for just how uninteresting of a person you are. Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a Western man is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably Caucasian. This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back. Hate yourself and apologize for being white to some Japanese entity that exists only in your mind while actual Japanese people put in effort to learn English for the valid reason of it being the global language.
April 2021

Weebs

So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was β€œpregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020

When you copy messages don't copy the name

twitchquotes: Jimmy_Swaggart: ForsenIsNeverLucky: FailFish DONT COPY THE FailFish NAME WHEN YOU FailFish COPY THE PASTA FailFish
twitch chat
May 2015

Classic

How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.
March 2021

Sense of pride and accomplishment

twitchquotes: The πŸ’° intent πŸ’° is πŸ’° to πŸ’° provide πŸ’° players πŸ’° with πŸ’° a πŸ’° sense πŸ’° of πŸ’° pride πŸ’° and πŸ’° accomplishment πŸ’° for πŸ’° unlocking πŸ’° different πŸ’° heroes. πŸ’° As πŸ’° for πŸ’° cost, πŸ’° we πŸ’° selected πŸ’° initial πŸ’° values πŸ’° based πŸ’° upon πŸ’° data πŸ’° from πŸ’° the πŸ’° Open πŸ’° Beta πŸ’° and πŸ’° other πŸ’° adjustments πŸ’° made πŸ’° to πŸ’° milestone πŸ’° rewards πŸ’° before πŸ’° launch. πŸ’° Among πŸ’° other πŸ’° things, πŸ’° we're πŸ’° looking πŸ’° at πŸ’° average πŸ’° per-player πŸ’° credit πŸ’° earn πŸ’° rates πŸ’° on πŸ’° a πŸ’° daily πŸ’° basis, πŸ’° and πŸ’° we'll πŸ’° be πŸ’° making πŸ’° constant πŸ’° adjustments πŸ’° to πŸ’° ensure πŸ’° that πŸ’° players πŸ’° have πŸ’° challenges πŸ’° that πŸ’° are πŸ’° compelling, πŸ’° rewarding, πŸ’° and πŸ’° of πŸ’° course πŸ’° attainable πŸ’° via πŸ’° gameplay. We πŸ’° appreciate πŸ’° the πŸ’° candid πŸ’° feedback, πŸ’° and πŸ’° the πŸ’° passion πŸ’° the πŸ’° community πŸ’° has πŸ’° put πŸ’° forth πŸ’° around πŸ’° the πŸ’° current πŸ’° topics πŸ’° here πŸ’° on πŸ’° Reddit, πŸ’° our πŸ’° forums πŸ’° and πŸ’° across πŸ’° numerous πŸ’° social πŸ’° media πŸ’° outlets. Our πŸ’° team πŸ’° will πŸ’° continue πŸ’° to πŸ’° make πŸ’° changes πŸ’° and πŸ’° monitor πŸ’° community πŸ’° feedback πŸ’° and πŸ’° update πŸ’° everyone πŸ’° as πŸ’° soon πŸ’° and πŸ’° as πŸ’° often πŸ’° as πŸ’° we πŸ’° can. πŸ’°
twitch chat
November 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing