[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Troll face

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–’β–„β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Classic

Think you can beat me?

β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β  β „β „β ’β ‚β’€β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β’€β‘€β „β£°β£Άβ£¦β‘ˆβ „β „β „β „β „β „THINK ⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣖⣿⣷⣴⑄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄YOU ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⠛⠩⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄CAN ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣾⣿⣿⑏⠉⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄BEAT β „β „β’€β£΄β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ Ίβ‘‡β „β’΅β£€β£€β „β „β „β „β „ME β „β’ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘β β „β£·β£€β ˆβ ™β ›β ‘β „β „β „β „1,2,3? ⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⑇⠹⣿⣿⣿⑦⠄⠹Ⓙ⑇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ β „β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ β’°β£€β£€β£€β£ β£”β’°β „β „β „β „β’€β‘ˆβ „β „β „ β’ β£Ώβ£Ώβ Ÿβ „β „β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ β’Έβ‘†β „β β „β’Έβ£Ώβ£Œβ „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘†β „β „β’Έβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ’Ώβ‘€β „β ˆβ „β „β’€β „β’°β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘„β „ β ˆβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£·β „β „β „β£Ώβ£·β£¦β „β β „β „β „β ˜β „β ˜β’Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β „ β „β ˆβ »β£Ώβ£‡β  β „β’€β‘‰β „β „β „β „β „β’€β‘†β „β „β ˜β£Ώβ‘‡β „ β „β „β „β ˜β£Ώβ£§β’€β£Ώβ£Ώβ’·β£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£Ύβ’Ÿβ£Ύβ£„β „β‘΄β£Ώβ‘€β „ β „β „β „β „β ˜β£Ώβ£§β£β£Ώβ£·β£β’Ώβ£Ώβ ‡β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Žβ‘‘β ‹β „β „ β „β „β „β „β „β£β ›β ‹β β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Žβ’ β£΄β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β „β „β „β „ β „β „β „β „β’ β£Ώβ£·β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ β ˜β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘„β „β „β „ β „β „β „β „β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ƒβ „β „β ˆβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β „β „β „
ascii art
November 2018

Classic

GUYS PLEASE HELP! I NEED HELP!

twitchquotes: WHEN I SAT DOWN ⬇️ TO PEE πŸ’¦ THERE WAS A BUG 🐞 IN THE TOILET 🚽 BUT I THOUGHT πŸ’­ IT WAS DROWNED πŸŒŠπŸ‘» ❓❔❓❔ N WHEN I GOT UP ⬆️ IT WASN'T ❌ THERE πŸ‘‰ IM SOBBING 😭 IS IT IN MY FUCKING πŸ† BUTTHOLE πŸ‘β­• WHERE IS IT⁉️⁉️⁉️
twitch chat
August 2019

Emoji Pasta

Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth

twitchquotes: High in orbit, the Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth. They prepare to enslave the world and mine it for all its salt, but the scanners detect an abnormally high concentration inside a tiny shack in Greece. The invasion won't be necessary. "Lock onto him with the RNG disruptor," says the captain, greedily. "Soon we shall have all the salt we need."
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Classic

salty

Anyone basing trades right now on fundamentals is a fucking tool

So many arrogant fucks here love talking fundamental analysis when they can't even tell me if lil’ Yachty got another Ferrari much less how stuffed the fucking Oreos are now. Fucking clowns, all of them. Shut the fuck up and do your trades. If you really need a valuation multiple you can't even derive to tell you whether you should buy a stock or not, you deserve CHGG. Newsflash, the stock market never made sense nor will it. Best you can do is trade gourd futures you know about and feel with your hands that it hasn't been spotted by any number of fungal pathogens in the complex ecology of modern supply chains. Or alternatively manipulate markets like the rich investors who funnel you into silver every fucking time like clockwork. Warren Buffet's dad was Paul Revere, if you think that shit didn't help The Wizard of Omaha then not only are you retarded but also delusional. Now stfu about EBITDA and long term debt-to-equity ratios. If you actually knew what the fuck was going to happen you'd be chilling in r/lounge with a fat chick, not on wsb posting "anyone basing trades right now on technical analysis is fucking tool.”
February 2022

WallStreetBets

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