[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
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no one will notice me seeking attention from strangers

twitchquotes: chat moving so fast no one will notice me seeking attention from strangers on the internet because my parents didn't give me any.
twitch chat
November 2017

Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. β€œAre you coming to bed?” your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. You’ll stop soon, though. β€œSoon!” you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltβ€”the alternation feature brokenβ€”on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like they’re bleeding. Like your calls. After a timeβ€”hours?β€”you realize you’re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Anime girl 3

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–„β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–’β–β–β–β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–€β–„β–€β–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–’β–’β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–€β–€β–„β–β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–‘β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–β–β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–’β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–„β–€β–’β–β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–β–’β–€β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–’β–β–’β–’β–’ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’
January 2017

Weebs

Pokemon Marathon Season 3 Intermission

twitchquotes: IT'S HERACROSS ResidentSleeper THIS LOOKS BAD ResidentSleeper WINDS OF NEW BEGINNINGS ResidentSleeper GLIGARMAN ResidentSleeper LOOK, TOGEPI ResidentSleeper RETURN EVERYBODY ResidentSleeper IT'S SUPER EXPENSIVE ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
September 2018

Pokemon Marathon 2018

A very convincing EU > NA

twitchquotes: C9 loses to G2 with First time Top lane Perkz βœ… β€’ TL loses to FNC with a sub jungler debuting for them βœ… β€’ TSM loses to OG role swapping Nukeduck and Patrik and Patrik’s first competitive Neeko game βœ… A very convincing EU > NA
twitch chat
July 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing