Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. Itโs not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. Itโs a ๐ณ๏ธโ๐๐ป legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflationโฆ He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to beโฆ transitory. He became so powerfulโฆ the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
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Bullish market makes me hard
When the stocks ๐๐ go up ๐๐ธ, my dick goes too ๐โฌ๏ธ๐ณ. Bullish ๐ market ๐ฌ makes me hard ๐ฆด๐ฆ. All the countries ๐ณ๏ธ๐ด๐ดโโ ๏ธ๐๐ฉ๐ณ๏ธโ๐๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธ๐บ๐ณ try to recover ๐ from corona ๐ฆ so the money ๐ฐ๐ต๐ธ flows ๐ฌ into my pocket ๐ณ. Soon ๐ there will be a crash ๐๐ญ๐ฅบ๐ and the bears ๐ป will crawl ๐ผ out of their holes ๐ณ. Then they cut off my greedy dick โ๏ธ๐๐ฉธ if I donโt โ eat โem out ๐
๐ธ. I must turn into a bear ๐โก๏ธ๐ป and make ๐ค๐ผ more money ๐ฐ๐ต๐ธ and eat some honey ๐ป๐ฏ. When Iโm done โ
Iโll throw a party ๐๐ท๐พ and eat your ass ๐
๐.
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I am financially ruined
I came here for the first time and in 3 minutes made the decision to put way more than I can afford into PLTR calls. Iโm too retarded and now I literally dont know what to do I am financially ruined and I canโt even remember what I read that said this pltr thing was a good move. Fml
WallStreetBets
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise?
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. Itโs not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. Itโs a ๐ณ๏ธโ๐๐ป legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflationโฆ He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to beโฆ transitory. He became so powerfulโฆ the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
WallStreetBets
Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla
December 2021. Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla (Elon Musk invented a more efficient form of security). ARK ETFs are trading at minimum $1,000 a share and investors are signing 10-year pledges just for the privilege. I log on to my Tesla taxi app and order a car. A vintage Roadster pulls up with EDM playing at a tasteful volume.
"Where to, King?" asks the anime girl on the console. "You know where", I reply. Palantir knows.
We both laugh and the car takes off to Wendys.
WallStreetBets
Apple announces an EV program
Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.