TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass
Last night my wife and I were getting hot and heavy, and began having sex. During sex, I decided to put in a little spanking.
This is where things got weird.
As I slapped her ass in the heat of the moment, she bursts out with “yes daddy, spank me harder!” (To preface I knew she had some serious daddy issues)This initially was a turn on, but after a few seconds all I could think of was disciplining my daughter and my face went sour. I stopped immediately and felt awkward. She responded with “what’s wrong daddy, did you not punish me enough?”
I walked out of the room and told her I needed a minute. Now I don’t think I can ever have sex again.
TL;DR slapped my wife’s ass, called me daddy, now I can only think about disciplining my daughter and don’t know if I can ever have sex again
I used to be a real ad
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Are you Reynad's dad?
twitchquotes:
I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
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IS EARTH PREPARED FOR THE LANDING OF THE MOTHERSHIP?
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📞👽 HELLO? SINATRAA (SPECIMEN #3457) 📞👽HOW IS YOUR MISSION GOING? 📞👽 IS EARTH PREPARED FOR THE LANDING OF THE MOTHERSHIP? 📞👽
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Show us THE decks
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Enough with the bullshit Kripp. We all know you've hid away the best decks for this expansion to be showing off to the ladies, and we in chat find that really weird. All we want is to watch you win, and yet you play some bullshit hunter for some bullshit reason and all you do is lose. Show us the decks Kripp. Show us THE decks.
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LPT: If you’re tall, when speaking to a short person, kneel down or else you’re being ableist
LPT: If you’re tall, when speaking to a short person, kneel down or else you’re being ableist
Being short is a disability, and as a tall person, it's your responsibility to make sure short people don't get even more disabled by having to look up to speak to you. Doing this can damage their neck. Standing up while talking to short people also makes them feel threatened and unsafe so kneeling down not only prevents them from damaging their necks but also makes them feel more safe. Not doing this means you don't respect short people, you're mocking their disability, you're looking down on them and that's ableist, so be the bigger man and kneel.
Thank you.
I Cri Evrytiem (Like This If You Cry Everytime)
Wun day, a boi n a gurl wer walkin w skool. Dey wer holdin handz and redy 2 seluhbrayt der 2 hour aniverssaree.
Da gurl turnt 2 da boi n say "bbz, do u luv me 4ever?!"
Da boi turnt 2 her n say "NO!"
Da gurl wuz <3brokn n run away frum da boi. She run in2 da street n got hit by a car.
Da boi run ovur 2 da gurl n hold her az she dyieng
"I wuz gonna say, I luv u 5ever"
Da boy den pull out hiz gat n shoot himself ded.
As his bodee hit da assfalt, a bawks rolled of his poccet. A bootyful dimund ring wuz nside.
Liek dis if u cry evrytiem