TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass
Last night my wife and I were getting hot and heavy, and began having sex. During sex, I decided to put in a little spanking.
This is where things got weird.
As I slapped her ass in the heat of the moment, she bursts out with “yes daddy, spank me harder!” (To preface I knew she had some serious daddy issues)This initially was a turn on, but after a few seconds all I could think of was disciplining my daughter and my face went sour. I stopped immediately and felt awkward. She responded with “what’s wrong daddy, did you not punish me enough?”
I walked out of the room and told her I needed a minute. Now I don’t think I can ever have sex again.
TL;DR slapped my wife’s ass, called me daddy, now I can only think about disciplining my daughter and don’t know if I can ever have sex again
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Doublelift dodges Imaqtpie in queue
twitchquotes:
Doublelift fired up his stream for another day of soloQ, but foolishly forgot to check if Imaqtpie was in a game. He opened up QT’s stream to find him sitting in queue… He frantically began tabbing between his client and QT’s stream, then one after the other… both queues popped. “I need the toilet” he said to his chat. He ran to the wall and unplugged his internet. He was safe for another day.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Classic
League of Legends
I'm gonna play this perfectly. Kripp misses lethal.
twitchquotes:
Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
When a streamer complains it's seen as letting some steam out...
twitchquotes:
Wʜᴇɴ ᴀ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇʀ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴀɪɴs ɪᴛ's sᴇᴇɴ ᴀs ʟᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ sᴏᴍᴇ sᴛᴇᴀᴍ ᴏᴜᴛ. Bᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ Kʀɪᴘᴘ sᴛʀᴀᴘs ᴀ 30150-ALQAIDA ʙᴏᴍʙᴠᴇsᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʙᴜɪʟᴛ ɪɴ ʀᴇᴍᴏᴛᴇ ᴅᴇᴛᴏɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀ 15 ᴍᴇᴛᴇʀ ᴇxᴘʟᴏsɪᴏɴ ʀᴀᴅɪᴜs ᴏɴ ʜɪs ᴄʜᴇsᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ʜɪs ᴡᴀʏ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ Bʟɪᴢᴢᴀʀᴅ HᴇᴀᴅQᴜᴀʀᴛᴇʀs ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴇ ʟᴏsᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴀ Pʏʀᴏʙʟᴀsᴛ... ʜᴇ's ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ sᴀʟᴛʏ?
twitch chat
Kripp
STFU Weebs
⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⣿⠛⠛⠛⠛⢻⠛⠛⠛⢻⡟⠛⣿⣿⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⠐⠿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠈⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⢰⣶⣾⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣇⣉⣁⣤⣿⣿⣇⣸⣿⣿⣀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣤⣈⣁⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⡿⢿⣿⡿⠿⣿⡿⢿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠿⣿
⡇⠈⣿⠄⠄⣿⠃⣸⡇⠄⣶⣶⣿⡇⢰⣶⣶⣿⠄⢸⡷⠄⣿⡇⠰⢿⣶⣿
⣿⠄⠋⢰⡆⠸⠄⣿⡇⠄⣤⣤⣿⡇⢠⣤⣤⣿⠄⢰⣤⠈⢻⣿⣦⣄⠈⢿
⣿⣇⣀⣾⣷⣀⣸⣿⣇⣀⣉⣉⣹⣇⣈⣉⣉⣿⣀⣈⣉⣠⣾⣋⣉⣉⣠⣿
Weebs
I don't geddit
Reddit should rename 'share' to 'spreddit', 'delete' to 'shreddit' and 'karma' to 'creddit'. Yet they haven't. I don't geddit.