Its the final hand of the Mortdog High Stakes Poker Tourney. Kiyoon can be heard screaming "its a third??” after losing the last hand. Only Raydiz and K3soju are left. Mort deals their cards. Soju smirks and says “alright, bet”. Ray, feeling confident, slides all his chips into the middle of the table “fuck it, we’re all in this round”. Soju confidently throws down his cards “3 aces, KEWK”. Ray laughs and reveals his winning hand “I have a straight flush, diamond 1 to diamond 5”
I used to be a real ad
More Teamfight Tactics Copypastas
Ninja Assassins is not fun or interactive
twitchquotes:
Ninja Assassins created a strategy that revolved around trying to defeat your opponent in one crit without requiring any battles on the board. Fighting for board control and battles between minions make an overall game of Teamfight Tactics more fun and compelling, but taking 20000+ damage in one Zed crit is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
Teamfight Tactics
According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9
According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9 with this board. Its gold are too small, and its comp is not stable. The Soju, of course, goes fast 9 anyway because Soju doesn't care what humans think is a fast eif.
k3soju
Teamfight Tactics
Setsuko, the crybaby of TFT
twitchquotes:
Setsuko, the crybaby of TFT, graces us with a melodramatic "HELP! HELP!, LIKE PLEASE!" as he navigates the turbulent seas of RNG. Oh, and let's not forget his profound insight: "THIS SHIT COMPANY." A true visionary, leading us to eighth place with unparalleled wisdom. "IS IT MY FAULT?" he ponders, as the drama unfolds. And then, in a moment of clarity, he poses the existential question: "Do you guys hate me?". Setsuko, the unsung hero of TFT! xddFRAUD
twitch chat
Teamfight Tactics
haven’t done assassins in a while
twitchquotes:
"alright, locket I guess” 
“haven’t done assassins in a while” “guess I’ll pick up this akali” “oh look, 6 assassins”
“haven’t done assassins in a while” “guess I’ll pick up this akali” “oh look, 6 assassins”
twitch chat
Teamfight Tactics
Alright, ocean mage, I guess
twitchquotes:
“Alright, ocean mage, I guess” “Haven’t picked moist magician in a while, let’s go wet wizard “hydro conjuror isn’t that good, but alright”
“Alright, ocean mage, I guess” “Haven’t picked moist magician in a while, let’s go wet wizard “hydro conjuror isn’t that good, but alright”
twitch chat