[Copypasta] I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot

I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot. My earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen anyone in the near vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or will ever produce, shot out so hard that it ripped my dick apart by my übernut accelerating to 7% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused my building to collapse, and every female in the city to fall pregnant with my children. As I lay dying under the rubble, I rest assured knowing every one of my sons will repeat this glorious act.
January 2024
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

STFU Weebs

⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⣿⠛⠛⠛⠛⢻⠛⠛⠛⢻⡟⠛⣿⣿⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠐⠿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠈⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⢰⣶⣾⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⣉⣁⣤⣿⣿⣇⣸⣿⣿⣀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣤⣈⣁⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⢿⣿⡿⠿⣿⡿⢿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠿⣿ ⡇⠈⣿⠄⠄⣿⠃⣸⡇⠄⣶⣶⣿⡇⢰⣶⣶⣿⠄⢸⡷⠄⣿⡇⠰⢿⣶⣿ ⣿⠄⠋⢰⡆⠸⠄⣿⡇⠄⣤⣤⣿⡇⢠⣤⣤⣿⠄⢰⣤⠈⢻⣿⣦⣄⠈⢿ ⣿⣇⣀⣾⣷⣀⣸⣿⣇⣀⣉⣉⣹⣇⣈⣉⣉⣿⣀⣈⣉⣠⣾⣋⣉⣉⣠⣿
September 2019

Weebs

SIMP

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December 2020

Simps

Hey Kripp, how's it going, Hero Academy 2 Dev here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, how's it going, Hero Academy 2 Dev here. We noticed that your salty streams are interesting and entertaining. To fix this issue, we have decided to offer you money to play our very uninteresting and boring card game that is clearly a clone of Hearthstone. We look forward to future business with you and hope that you can sellout out a little bit more in the future. ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

salty

what's the Aura appeal?

twitchquotes: what's the Aura appeal? I have nothing against him personally, but I went to his stream twice and both times 12 year olds were spamming copy pastas and overlong donation messages
twitch chat
July 2020
Aurateur

I, a god-level CoD player, could join the military

Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
February 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing