[Copypasta] I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot

I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot. My earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen anyone in the near vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or will ever produce, shot out so hard that it ripped my dick apart by my übernut accelerating to 7% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused my building to collapse, and every female in the city to fall pregnant with my children. As I lay dying under the rubble, I rest assured knowing every one of my sons will repeat this glorious act.
January 2024
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Running dog

┈┈┈┈╱▏┈┈┈┈┈╱▔▔▔▔╲┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈┈┈▏▏┈┈┈┈┈▏╲▕▋▕▋▏┈┈┈┈ ┈┈┈┈╲╲┈┈┈┈┈▏┈▏┈▔▔▔▆┈┈┈ ┈┈┈┈┈╲▔▔▔▔▔╲╱┈╰┳┳┳╯┈┈┈ ┈┈╱╲╱╲▏┈┈┈┈┈┈▕▔╰━╯┈┈┈┈ ┈┈▔╲╲╱╱▔╱▔▔╲╲╲╲┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈┈┈╲╱╲╱┈┈┈┈╲╲▂╲▂┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈╲╱╲╱┈┈┈┈┈
November 2014

LCS sponsorships

I can’t wait to see TSM FTX take DIG QNTMPAY’s CISCO NEXUS after they win the GRUBHUB team fight and get a BUD LIGHT ACE at the RED BULL BARON. I can then tweet on the VERIZON 5G all chat during the ROCCAT REPLAY and STATE FARM analyst desk.
July 2021

sellout

League of Legends

Just kidding, it's still Tanner

twitchquotes: H-hey Octavian, do you remember me from Biology? Freshman year? It's Laura. I just wanted to stop by since you missed the last reunion, I was looking for you. I always thought you were really smart and talented, but I could never work up the nerve to tell you. Anyway, I hope you're doing well...HAHA Just kidding, it's still Tanner you fucking gullible idiot lmfao. Anyway, the gym awaits, see ya man good talk.
twitch chat
August 2018
Kripp

Classic

Tanner from High School

God I wish Winston was real

twitchquotes: God I wish Winston was real. I want him to sit on my face with his furry ass. I want him to yell "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" as he thrusts into me. I want him to spam "OH YEAH" when we're finished. God if Blizzard made life-sized cutouts of Winston I would buy them all for myself and keep them in my basement for my pleasure. God I wish Winston was real.
twitch chat
March 2018

Overwatch

Kissahomie

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⣴⣼⣵⣾⣴⣤⣦⣄⣴⣶⣬⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿ ⢀⣿⣭⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⡶⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡀⠄⠄ ⣼⣿⣿⣿⣯⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣿⣿⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣕⡀ ⣿⣿⡿⢻⣿⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⣼⣿⣿⣤⠘⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷ ⣿⣿⣇⠈⠺⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿ ⣽⣿⣿⣳⣿⡌⠙⠛⠿⠛⢋⣛⣿⣿⠇⣠⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠿⠋⠄⠈⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣦⣶⠄⠻⢿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠻⠼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⣰⢟⣵⣿ ⠂⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢫⡶⣪⢶⣿⣿⣿
February 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing