[Copypasta] I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot

I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot. My earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen anyone in the near vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or will ever produce, shot out so hard that it ripped my dick apart by my übernut accelerating to 7% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused my building to collapse, and every female in the city to fall pregnant with my children. As I lay dying under the rubble, I rest assured knowing every one of my sons will repeat this glorious act.
January 2024
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Grand Dragon Jebodiah Pasterino

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, this is the Grand Dragon of the KKK, Jebodiah Pasterino. I see you're wearing one of our signature white hoods. We at the KKK do not associate with casuals such as yourself. Please remove the hood or we will take legal action.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019

Vegan prison

twitchquotes: Attention Kripp: As a friendly vegan lawyer, you need to inform chat this is 100% sellout stream. If you want to stay away from vegan prison where meat is stuffed into all new inmates, inform chat now.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

Hey raynad im a 11 year old boy named Dan

twitchquotes: Hey raynad im a 11 year old boy named Dan and i watched your stream. My mom walked in on my watching you and she saw you drinking the beers. She beat me with a shoe and made me sleep outside in the dog house becsuse of you
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Monte Cristo's statement

twitchquotes: hello my fellow kappas my name is Kappastankapsterinocunnio, you could also call me monte cristo. voyboy is very gud in mid beddar than link and mid pack and mediorcre. i learn to spell from russian infantry 586. i hate regi cuz he monkey king and spews garbage and lies to all of my wrong doings. I jack off with clg hat in korea instead of coache mai team . voyboy is a sweet hart i wish we *** someteim i luv him. he *** my team in playoffs and i leik it all the time. enuff about voyboy more about kappa town. kappaccino koccino frappatino pls no copy pastarinocappaciino cocinai luv u all pjsaltyarion
twitch chat
August 2014
onGamers
Text-to-Speech Playing