[Copypasta] Europe is the Eastern USA

twitchquotes: Europe was founded in 1848 by Walker Texas Ranger when he rode a horse across the Atlantic, he called it "Eastern USA" which was eventually abbreviated as just "EU"
twitch chat
March 2014

Classic

EU vs NA

I used to be a real ad
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Natalie Portman is the reason I work out

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink. "Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave. Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette. "Got a spare?" she asks. "What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles. "Conversation with me, duh." I laugh. "What's so funny?" she protests. "Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?" "You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter. "What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask. "Teaching, I think." "And if I was your student, what would I be learning?" "Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?" "Bermuda," I say. "Oh wow. That's lovely." "It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking." "What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires. "I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
January 2021

Classic

Nacho cheese torpedo

twitchquotes: Guys, please don't spam. My daughter made a macaroni dinosaur in school and it passes its days pasted to my laptop screen. When too many messages show up it starts turning into a nacho cheese torpedo. God bless, thanks for understanding.
twitch chat
June 2016

Classic

Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

Classic

KappaPride

BURGERS I EAT ALL DAY

twitchquotes: OpieOP BURGERS I EAT ALL DAY OpieOP LEAGUE OF LEGENDS I CANNOT PLAY OpieOP EU STAR PLAYERS I HAVE TO PAY OpieOP PROPER HEALTHCARE AN OCEAN AWAY OpieOP YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT OpieOP IM NA OpieOP
twitch chat
August 2018

Classic

EU vs NA

You need a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. ๐Ÿ˜‚ And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
September 2017

Rick and Morty

Classic

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