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March 2014
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Plane

⠀⠀⠀⣖⠲⑀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Ⓒ⠉⑇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⑆⠹⑀⣠⒀⑄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⑏⠀⑧⒀⑄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β‘§β’„β£Ήβ£…β£œβ‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’Έβ β €β’Ήβ šβ ƒβ €β €β €β €β € ⠀⣀⠴⒒⣉⑹⣢⣀⣀⑉⠉⠒⠒⠒⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⠇⠀⠀Ⓒ⠠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β ˆβ ‰β β €β €β €β ‰β ’β ―β£Ÿβ£²β ¦β£€β£€β‘€β €β €β ˆβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ›β ’β »β’₯β£€β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ™β£²β‘¬β ­β Ώβ’·β£¦β£€β’„β£€β €β €β šβ ›β ›β “β’¦β‘€ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β£€β €β ΄β šβ ‰β β €β €β €β €β£€β£‰β‘½β£•β£―β‘‰β ‰β ‰β ‘β’’β£’β‘Ύ β €β €β£€β‘ β ΄β ’β ‰β ‰β €β’€β£€β£€β €β‘€β’Άβ£Άβ£‹β ‰β ‰β €β €β €β ˆβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β β € β£–β£‰β£β£ β €β Άβ‘Άβ‘Άβ’β‘‰β €β €β €β ™β ’β ―β œβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € ⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⒦⣯⠇
August 2019

Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland

Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land. Win - We dinnae want ye here Tae - Yer nae hard enough Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc) Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land. Fuck off hame any English cunts.
September 2021

Called my overweight female friend a heckin chonker today and now she won’t talk to me

My female friend was crying about how fat she was and I was trying to comfort her by telling her that she didn’t look that fat but she kept accusing me of lying to make her feel bad so I thought that saying β€œmaybe your just a heckin chonker” would cheer her up and lighten the mood but she just looked at me and left. I hope she realised that I was only being nice and that she is being irrational.
August 2021

DickButt

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
August 2015

Hey! I noticed you used an emoji.

Hey! I noticed you used an emoji. I don’t know if you’re new here, so I’ll let you off the hook this time. Using emojis is frowned upon here on this great site, and for good reason. Instagram normies often use them, and you don’t want to be a normie, do you? If I catch you using an emoji in the future, I’ll be forced to issue a downvote to your comment. Why should you care, you may ask? Well to begin, you will lose karma on your account, which is a useful social status tool and also a way to show others you know your way around Reddit. If you were to continue the use of emojis, I would be forced to privately message you about your slip-up. Any further offenses past that would leave me no other option than to report your account. I don’t think I have to explain why you don’t want that. But anyways, no harm done yet! Follow these simple rules and you’ll enjoy your future on Reddit! Have a blessed (and hopefully emoji-free) day, stranger.
April 2022
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