[Copypasta] Please stop spamming, for Bernard

twitchquotes: Guys please stop spamming. My dog, Bernard, looked at my chat and got so dizzy because of the spam that he fell down and hit his noggin right on his food bowl! He couldn't talk for hours. Please stop spamming, for Bernard.
twitch chat
December 2014

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My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

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UwU

⑆⣐⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⠅⒗⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⠕⠕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕ ⒐⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⣕⒕⒕⠕⠁⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⠅⑄⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕ ⒕⒕⒕⒕⒕⠅⒗⒕⠕⣠⠄⣗⒕⒕⠕⒕⒕⒕⠕⒠⣿⠐⒕⒕⒕⠑⒕⒕⠡⒕ β’•β’•β’•β’•β β’œβ •β’β£΄β£Ώβ‘‡β’“β’•β’΅β’β’•β’•β •β’β£Ύβ’Ώβ£§β ‘β’•β’•β „β’‘β’•β …β’• ⒕⒕⠡⒁⠔⒁⣀⣀⣢⣢⣢⑐⣕Ⓗ⠐⒕⠕⣑⣾⣢⣢⣢⣀⑁⒓⒕⠄⒑⒅⒑ ⠍⣧⠄⣢⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣔⒕⒄⒑⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⑑⒕⒀⠱⒐ β’ β’•β …β£Ύβ£Ώβ ‹β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ‰β£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β£¦β£Άβ£½β£Ώβ£Ώβ ˆβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ β’Ήβ£·β£·β‘…β’ β£”β’•β’₯β’»β£Ώβ‘€β ˆβ ›β ›β β’ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘€β ˆβ ›β ›β β „β£Όβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β’” β’•β’•β’½β’Έβ’Ÿβ’Ÿβ’–β’–β’€β£Άβ‘Ÿβ’»β£Ώβ‘Ώβ »β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ’€β£Ώβ£¦β’€β’€β’”β’žβ’Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ β’• β’•β’•β …β£β’•β’•β’•β’•β’•β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘„β ›β’€β£¦β ˆβ ›β’β£Όβ£Ώβ’—β’•β’•β’•β’•β’•β’•β‘β£˜β’• ⒕⒕⠅⒓⣕⣕⣕⣕⣡⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣕⒕⒕⒕⒕②⒀⒕⒕ β’‘β’•β ƒβ‘ˆβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ’ƒβ’•β’•β’• ⣆⒕⠄⒱⣄⠛Ⓙ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⒁⒕⒕⠕⒁ β£Ώβ£¦β‘€β£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β£Άβ£¬β£β£›β£›β£›β‘›β Ώβ Ώβ Ώβ ›β ›β’›β£›β£‰β£­β£€β£‚β’œβ •β’‘β£‘β£΄β£Ώ
ascii art
December 2019

Weebs

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A New Toucan Has Arrived

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘Aβ–‘NEWβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘TOUCANβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘HASβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ARRIVEDβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β– β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–“β–“β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β– β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
January 2019

Classic

My idiot boyfriend spent my college fund on dog coins how do I get it back???

He talked me into spending the $8500 I have on dog coins because something was supposed to happen yesterday which would have given us more money?? but it didn't actually happen or got canceled or something I don't really know or understand how it works but I went to the dog coin site to withdraw my money and there is only about $6700 of it there, where is the rest of it? I tried looking at the faq but don't really get it
February 2021

WallStreetBets

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Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss

In Japan πŸ‡―πŸ‡΅ , heart surgeon β€οΈπŸ‘¨β€βš•οΈ . Number one 😭☝️ . Steady handπŸ˜³βœ‹οΈ. One day, Yakuza boss πŸ™‡πŸ»need πŸ†• heartπŸ’˜. I do operationπŸ”ͺβš”οΈ. But, mistake😱! Yakuza boss die😡πŸ˜ͺ! Yakuza very madπŸ‘Ώ. I hideπŸ™ˆ in fishing boatπŸŸπŸš£πŸ»β€β™€οΈ, come to AmericaπŸŽ‡πŸŽŠπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ. No english🀐, no food😩, no moneyπŸ“‰πŸš«πŸ’². Darryl πŸ‘¨πŸΏgive me jobπŸ™ŒπŸ‘¨πŸ»β€πŸ’Ό. Now I have house🏑, American car πŸš— , and new woman πŸ†•πŸ‘±πŸ»β€β™€οΈ. Darryl πŸ‘¨πŸΏsave lifeβ›‘. My big secretπŸ™Š: I kill ☠️yakuza boss on purpose😈. I good πŸ‘surgeon. The bestπŸ‘ŒπŸ’―!
July 2019

Emoji Pasta

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