I used to be a real ad
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Just seen Biden in a hotel

twitchquotes: Just seen Biden in a hotel and I asked how he was feeling about the election. He laughed and winked at me, then grabbed me by the hair and dragged me into a toilet and spat in my mouth while whispering “count every vote” over and over in my ear. Make of that what you will.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius

twitchquotes: My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius, commander of the PJSalteers of the North, General of the Salty Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Saltarrian. Father to a Flamestriked son, husband to a Top decked wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this stream or the next.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

I can't stop staring at Sneaky's sexy face

twitchquotes: I woke up this morning ready to play some LoL. I went to the toilet and did my business like every day before making some green tea. I sat at my PC ready to play but then I had the thought: maybe I should check what's on Twitch. That was 8 hours ago and now I can't stop staring at Sneaky's sexy face.
twitch chat
May 2020
Sneaky

All becoming better than Kripp

twitchquotes: Ｗｈｅｎ Ｋｒｉｐｐ ｍｉｓｐｌａｙ, Ｉ ｗａｎｔ ｔｏ ｓｈｏｗ ｈｉｍ ｍｙ ｋｎｏｗｌｅｄｇｅ. Ｉ Ｃｒｉｔｉｃｉｚｅ ｈｉｓ ｇａｍｉｎｇ ａｂｉｌｉｔｉｅｓ ａｎｄ ｃａｌｌ ｈｉｍ ｔｈｅ ｎｏｏｂ. ａｌｌ ｂｅｃｏｍｉｎｇ ｂｅｔｔｅｒ ｔｈａｎ ｋｒｉｐｐ
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Having trouble climbing the ladder this season

twitchquotes: Hey Andrew, it's your mother. I have noticed that you are having trouble climbing the ladder this season and wanted to let you know that there is this website called Tempostorm.com that will help you get to legend. The nice man in the video said that you could stay ahead of the meta and becsome legendary.
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Can you guys stop typing 'misplay'?

twitchquotes: Can you guys stop typing 'misplay'? We know Kripp is not the best player and he might be a bit slow in the head, but stop pointing out the obvious by typing 'misplay' over and over.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Super dong to the rescue

twitchquotes: ─=≡Σ((( つ◕ل͜◕)つ sᴜᴘᴇʀ ᴅᴏɴɢ to the rescue
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

I am going to donate this big bunch of salt to you!

twitchquotes: This is a very interesting stream Kripp, you always makes me feel better everyday when watching with your oh so sweet voice, i am therefore going to donate this big bunch of salt i saved for you! PJSalt PJSalt PJSalt PJSalt PJSalt PJSalt PJSalt PJSalt
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp please supply the world with some salt

twitchquotes: Dear nl_Kripp with the Earth's salt mines running low near depletion. We can always rely on you for stepping up to the plate and supplying the world with some PJSalt
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

MIC VOLUME TOO LOW

twitchquotes: ｗｈｅｎ ｓｕｂ ｍｏｄｅ ｏｆｆ， ｉ ａｐｐｌｙ ｃａｎｃｅｒ ｄｉｒｅｃｔｌｙ ｔｏ ｃｈａｔ． ｉ ｓｔａｒｅ ａｔ ｔｈｅ ｃｈａｔ ａｎｄ ｓａｙ ｔｈｅ ＭＩＣ ＶＯＬＵＭＥ ＩＳ ＴＯＯ ＬＯＷ ａｌｌ ｍａｋｉｎｇ ｒｅｙｎａｄ
twitch chat
April 2014
Reynad
I used to be a real ad

Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021

Reynad is like a pigeon

twitchquotes: Reynad is like a pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between reynad and a pigeon is that reynad intends to rob us of our lives, our health, our honor, and our belongings.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Meanwhile in Kripp's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Kripp's mouth ~•　　　　 ~•　　　　　　　　~•　　　　　　　~•　　　　~• 　　　~•　　　　　　~•　　　　~•　　　　　　　 　~• ~• 　 　　~•　　　　　　~•　　　　~•　　　 ~• 　　　　~•　　　　　　~•　　　　~• 　　　　　　　　~• 　　　　　~•　　　　　　~•　 　　　~•　　　　　　　　~•
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hey raynad im a 11 year old boy named Dan

twitchquotes: Hey raynad im a 11 year old boy named Dan and i watched your stream. My mom walked in on my watching you and she saw you drinking the beers. She beat me with a shoe and made me sleep outside in the dog house becsuse of you
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

BREAKING NEWS

twitchquotes: ＢＲＥＡＫＩＮＧ ＮＥＷＳ： Ａｆｔｅｒ ｂｒｕｔａｌ ａｎａｌ ｆｉｓｔｉｎｇ ｐｅｒｆｏｒｍｅｄ ｂｙ Ｒｏｍａｎｉａｎ ｇｙｐｓｙ Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ， Ｓａｎｄｏｗｎ＇ｓ ａｎｕｓ ｈａｄ ａｎ ｅｍｏｔｉｏｎａｌ ｂｒｅａｋｄｏｗｎ ａｎｄ ｃｒｉｅｄ ｆｏｒ ａｔｔｅｎｔｉｏｎ ｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｓｔｒｅａｍ ｏｆ Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ．
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Kripp, this is an intervention

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is an intervention. We are very worried about you. Ever since you started playing Hearthstone, you have been becoming more and more casual. We care about you very much, but we can't just sit back and watch you torture yourself. Perhaps religion may help, have you heard of your lord and savior, RNGesus?
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Marginally optimizing a children's game!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, loyal fan chiming in here (for once). I think your stream is great! I would have spent my time working towards a cure for cancer, or how to automate food production in the 3rd world, but luckily i stumbled onto your stream and now I can waste my time watching you marginally optimize a children's game! What a career you have made!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Kripp's high time in coma

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is doctor Jeffrey Shih from the Athens General Hospital. You’ve been in a coma for several years now due to an overload of copypasta. I’m trying out a new method to get through to you. Please wake up! Your family misses you very much. Please wake up, you *** retard!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hey Kripp, here's a "hug" for you

twitchquotes: (Ɔ ˘⌣˘(˘⌣˘) Hey Kripp, here's a "hug" for you. (˘⌣˘)˘⌣˘ C)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(

I was watching you play Prismata yesterday and fell asleep

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. I was watching you play Prismata yesterday and fell asleep. In my dream I was playing prismata and fell asleep. The same thing happened in my dream's dream. It was the worst nightmare ever and I woke up in a cold sweat. Please don't play prismata anymore I don't want to go through that again. Pls no copy pastrami.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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