(◞≼◉ื≽◟ ;益;◞≼◉ื≽◟) ╭∩∩∩∩∩╮ HEY CHAT HERE'S A HIGH FIVE FOR YOU (◞≼◉ื≽◟ ;益;◞≼◉ื≽◟) ╭∩∩∩∩∩╮
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
They tried circumcising me but my foreskin only grew back stronger
They tried circumcising me but my foreskin only grew back stronger. Since then I have been circumcised every 6 months. My foreskin is now stronger than steel. When I am in danger, I pull it over my body like an outer shell. It is fully bulletproof, fireproof, waterproof and extremely lightweight. I have plans to sell it as a highly rare, resistant material and make millions. Brigades will be made out of beams of foreskin, and police units will wear foreskin vests.
They tried circumcising me but my foreskin only grew back stronger. Since then I have been circumcised every 6 months. My foreskin is now stronger than steel. When I am in danger, I pull it over my body like an outer shell. It is fully bulletproof, fireproof, waterproof and extremely lightweight. I have plans to sell it as a highly rare, resistant material and make millions. Brigades will be made out of beams of foreskin, and police units will wear foreskin vests.
my face when americans call chips "french fries"
>my face when americans call chips "french fries"
>my face when americans call crisps "chips"
>my face when americans call chocolate globbernaughts "candy bars"
>my face when americans call motorized rollinghams "cars"
>my face when americans call merry fizzlebombs "fireworks"
>my face when americans call wunderbahboxes a "PC"
>my face when americans call meat water "gravy"
>my face when americans call electro-rope "power cables"
>my face when americans call beef wellington ensemble with lettuce a "burger"
>my face when americans call whimsy flimsy mark and scribblers "pens"
>my face when americans call twisting plankhandles "doorknobs"
>my face when americans call breaddystack a "sandwich"
>my face when americans call their hoighty toighty tippy typers "keyboards"
>my face when americans call nutty-gum and fruit spleggings "peanut butter and jelly"
>my face when americans call an upsy stairsy the "escalator"
>my face when americans call a knittedy wittedy sheepity sleepity a "sweater"
>my face when americans call a rickedy-pop a "gear shift"
>my face when americans call a choco chip bucky wicky as a "cookie"
>my face when americans call a pip pip gollywock a "screwdriver"
>my face when americans call a rooty tooty point-n-shooty a "gun"
>my face when americans call ceiling-bright a "Lightbulb"
>my face when americans call blimpy bounce bounce a "ball"
>my face when americans call a slippery dippery long mover a "snake"
>my face when americans call cobble-stone-clippity-clops "roads"
>my face when americans call chips "french fries"
>my face when americans call crisps "chips"
>my face when americans call chocolate globbernaughts "candy bars"
>my face when americans call motorized rollinghams "cars"
>my face when americans call merry fizzlebombs "fireworks"
>my face when americans call wunderbahboxes a "PC"
>my face when americans call meat water "gravy"
>my face when americans call electro-rope "power cables"
>my face when americans call beef wellington ensemble with lettuce a "burger"
>my face when americans call whimsy flimsy mark and scribblers "pens"
>my face when americans call twisting plankhandles "doorknobs"
>my face when americans call breaddystack a "sandwich"
>my face when americans call their hoighty toighty tippy typers "keyboards"
>my face when americans call nutty-gum and fruit spleggings "peanut butter and jelly"
>my face when americans call an upsy stairsy the "escalator"
>my face when americans call a knittedy wittedy sheepity sleepity a "sweater"
>my face when americans call a rickedy-pop a "gear shift"
>my face when americans call a choco chip bucky wicky as a "cookie"
>my face when americans call a pip pip gollywock a "screwdriver"
>my face when americans call a rooty tooty point-n-shooty a "gun"
>my face when americans call ceiling-bright a "Lightbulb"
>my face when americans call blimpy bounce bounce a "ball"
>my face when americans call a slippery dippery long mover a "snake"
>my face when americans call cobble-stone-clippity-clops "roads"
Rudy Giuliani brings a plate of evidence
Holy shit. Rudy Giuliani came into the presser to bring me a plate of election fraud evidence and I literally screamed at him and hit the plate of evidence out of his hand. He started yelling "HEEEREEE'S KRAKEN!" at me and I cut the live feed on him. I’m so distressed right now I don’t know what to do. I didn’t mean to do that to Rudy but I’m literally in shock from the evidence tonight. I feel like I’m going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is he losing? This can’t be happening. I’m having a fucking breakdown. I don’t want to believe the world is so corrupt. I want to Build Back Better™. I want Biden to be president and fix this broken country. I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, I thought he was polling well in Michigan???? This is so fucked.
Holy shit. Rudy Giuliani came into the presser to bring me a plate of election fraud evidence and I literally screamed at him and hit the plate of evidence out of his hand. He started yelling "HEEEREEE'S KRAKEN!" at me and I cut the live feed on him. I’m so distressed right now I don’t know what to do. I didn’t mean to do that to Rudy but I’m literally in shock from the evidence tonight. I feel like I’m going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is he losing? This can’t be happening. I’m having a fucking breakdown. I don’t want to believe the world is so corrupt. I want to Build Back Better™. I want Biden to be president and fix this broken country. I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, I thought he was polling well in Michigan???? This is so fucked.