[Copypasta] Are you Reynad's dad?

twitchquotes: I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Reynad Copypastas

Only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant

twitchquotes: PogChamp only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant RNCelephant
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Deathrattle is "Lose the game"

twitchquotes: Guys what if Acidic swamp ooze was a 30/30, but its deathrattle was "Lose the game"? Would this be balanced? Should I contact bilbarzard??
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

If the human body is 75% water...

twitchquotes: If the human body is 75% water, how can you be 100% salt? Kappa
twitch chat
September 2015
Reynad

salty

Reynad keeps escaped walruses from the local zoo

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇᴛ Rᴇʏɴᴀᴅ! I ᴀᴍ Dᴀɴ Gᴜʟ, ᴏᴡɴᴇʀ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏᴄᴀʟ ᴢᴏᴏ. Wʜɪʟᴇ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴡᴇ ɴᴏᴛɪᴄᴇᴅ sᴏᴍᴇ ᴅɪsᴛᴜʀʙɪɴɢ sᴏᴜɴᴅs ᴄᴏᴍɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍɪᴄ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴇ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴄᴇɴᴛʟʏ ᴇsᴄᴀᴘᴇᴅ ᴡᴀʟʀᴜsᴇs. Iғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴛᴜʀɴ ᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴀʟʀᴜsᴇs ᴡɪᴛʜɪɴ 24 ʜᴏᴜʀs, ᴡᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ʜᴀᴠᴇ Tᴡɪᴛᴄʜ sʜᴜᴛ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜᴀɴɴᴇʟ. I'ᴍ ʙᴀɪᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ.
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

RNGesus pounds Reynad's sweet, supple orifice relentlessly

twitchquotes: Hello fair maiden Reynad, this is the valiant knight Sir Coppus Pastaronus. I have come to rescue you from the mystical Tower of Salt, where the cruel innkeeper RNGesus has pounded your sweet, supple orifice relentlessly to the beat of Lord Kappa Please no paste.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
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