twitchquotes:
╰(”◕﹏◕”)つ hello 2-3 police, i need you here right away, its an emergency ╰(”◕﹏◕”)つ
twitch chat
Kripp
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More Kripp Copypastas
Kripp will never, ever click the button
twitchquotes:
Kripp will never, ever click the button. The expansions will release at a faster rate than he can collect dust. Much like the contents of the briefcase in Pulp Fiction, the button is merely a carrot Kripp dangles in front of his viewers without any intention of actually delivering. This is blatantly obvious - he even admits he doesn't bother to calculate because he knows he'll never click it. We will spam this pasta until the button has been clicked.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Potato harvest is bad. Play Hearthstone in Amerikanski
twitchquotes:
My name Dimitri Baryshnikov. I grow up in small farm to have make potatos. Father say "Dimitri, potato harvest is bad. Need you to have play porfessional game in Amerikanski for make money for head-scarf for babushka." I bring honor to komrade and babushka. Sorry for is not have English. Plz no cykapasta
twitch chat
Kripp
Dear Mr. Morosan, this is the Hellenic Ministry of Health
twitchquotes:
Dear Mr. Morosan, this is the Hellenic Ministry of Health. We have received reports of excessive 
production on your Twitch channel. You are a toxic individual and are hereby classified a Class A threat to national security. Please turn yourself in at the nearest 
station to be deported.
production on your Twitch channel. You are a toxic individual and are hereby classified a Class A threat to national security. Please turn yourself in at the nearest station to be deported.
twitch chat
Kripp
salty
The One Who Brings Salt
twitchquotes:
Tells the legend that a long time ago all sea's water was fresh. But one tragic day a baby came out of the sea and was found by a group of african sea men. One week later, after the little baby saw the sea men play Hearth of Stone all the water turned salty. So they named him Kripp, which in Afrikaans means The One Who Brings Salt
twitch chat
Kripp
Kripp's kidney stone surgery
twitchquotes:
There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
twitch chat
Kripp