[Copypasta] Dear Kripp, I own the apple orchard outside Toronto

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I own the apple orchard outside Toronto and I am begging you to stop drinking so much OJ. Since you became popular on the Twitch our sales have decreased by over 69% because Canadians want to be like you. For *** sake please drink some apple juice! If you continue drinking OJ, I wont be able to feed my family anymore
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp invites twitch chat to his wedding

twitchquotes: ★ ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸¸ . …somewhere ° ☾ ° ¸. ● ¸ . ★ ° :. . • ° . * :. . ¸ .☾ . ● ¸ . ★ ° . • ○ ° ★ . * . ☾ ° ¸. …in a parallel universe* ● ¸ ° ☾ °☆ . * ¸. ★ ★ ° . . . ☾ °☆ . * ● ¸ . ★°★ . * . . ¸. * ● ¸ . …KRIPP ° ☾ ★ °● ¸ . ★ ° :. . • ○ ° ★. ● . ° ☾ °° . * :. . ¸ . ● ¸ * . …invites twitch chat to his wedding
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Slow mode, r9k mode, and randomly banning people, good job mods

twitchquotes: Boy, the mods in this channel have really done a bang-up job. When I first got here it was all cappuccino pasterino, but now that they're using slow mode, r9k and randomly banning people, we can finally have a productive chat without all the IDIOTS. Thank you, mods.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Trump gave Katie Kripp's MITHRIL ARMOR

twitchquotes: Hello "Kripp" ...or should I say COCKTAVIAN. Guess who? YEAH. It's KATIE. From HIGH SCHOOL. Ever since you left me to play this stupid game, me and Trump have decided to continue playing Runescape WITHOUT YOU. And guess what? He gave me your MITHRIL ARMOR. Have fun playing this stupid card game, JERK!.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

Best Polish one arm player

twitchquotes: i, my name Andrzej Waclawski, I'm Polish war veteran. In war of world 2 I lose right arm, never to grow back. My dream of become rank one superstar Polish Cardstone player make shattered forever. I like to get tip from the Kripp how I can become best Polish one arm player. Please no copytovski pasterovski
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here. We noticed that your streams are interesting and entertaining. To fix this issue, we have decided to offer you money to play our very uninteresting and boring card game that is clearly a clone of Hearthstone. We look foward to future business with you and hope that you can sellout out a little bit more in the future. ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp
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