[Copypasta] A navy seal trained in gorilla warfare

twitchquotes: Please do not copy and paste this copypasta. It is my original copypasta and is protected by copyright law. If I see anyone pasting my intellectual property without permission, a navy seal trained in gorilla warfare will smite you.
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September 2015
I used to be a real ad
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Barack Obama

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠋⠛⠛⠛⠻⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⢠⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⢀⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡁⠄⠄⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⡈⢔⠸⣐⢕⢕⢵⢰⢱⢰⢐⢤⡡⡢⣕⢄⢢⢠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡁⠂⠅⢕⠌⡎⡎⣎⢎⢮⢮⣳⡳⣝⢮⢺⢜⢕⢕⢍⢎⠪⡐⠄⠁⠄⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⠄⢅⠣⡡⡣⣣⡳⡵⣝⡮⣗⣗⡯⣗⣟⡮⡮⣳⣣⣳⢱⢱⠱⣐⠄⠂⠄⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢂⢈⠢⡱⡱⡝⣮⣿⣟⣿⣽⣷⣿⣯⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣾⣯⣗⡕⡇⡇⠄⠂⡀⢹⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⢀⢂⢕⢸⢨⢪⢳⡫⣟⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡺⡮⡣⡣⠠⢂⠒⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠐⠄⡂⠆⡇⣗⣝⢮⢾⣻⣞⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣽⣯⡯⣺⢸⢘⠨⠔⡅⢨⣿ ⣿⣿⠋⠉⠙⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⡂⡪⡪⡪⡮⡮⡯⣻⣽⣾⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⡯⣯⡺⡸⡰⡱⢐⡅⣼⣿ ⣿⠡⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠈⠆⠱⠑⠝⠜⠕⡝⡝⣞⢯⢿⣿⣿⡿⣟⣿⣿⣿⡿⡿⣽⣷⣽⡸⡨⡪⣂⠊⣿⣿ ⣿⠡⠄⡨⣢⠐⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠍⡓⣗⡽⣝⠽⠍⠅⠑⠁⠉⠘⠘⠘⠵⡑⢜⢀⢀⢉⢽ ⣿⠁⠠⢱⢘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠈⠱⣁⠜⡘⠌⠄⠄⡪⣳⣟⡮⢅⠤⠠⠄⠄⣀⣀⡀⡀⠄⠈⡂⢲⡪⡠⣿ ⣿⡇⠨⣺⢐⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠤⡠⡢⢒⠦⠠⠄⠄⠄⡸⢽⣟⢮⠢⡂⡐⠄⡈⡀⠤⡀⠄⠑⢄⠨⢸⡺⣐⣿ ⣿⣿⠈⠕⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡂⡪⡐⡥⢤⣰⣰⣰⡴⡮⠢⠂⠄⠄⡊⢮⢺⢕⢵⢥⡬⣌⣒⡚⣔⢚⢌⢨⢚⠌⣾⡪⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣆⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡑⢕⢕⡯⡷⣕⢧⢓⢭⠨⡀⠄⡂⠨⡨⣪⡳⣝⢝⡽⣻⣻⣞⢽⣲⢳⢱⢡⠱⠨⣟⢺⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⡅⠇⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠨⢪⢹⢽⢽⣺⢝⠉⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⢌⢎⡖⡯⡎⡗⢝⠜⣶⣯⣻⢮⡻⣟⣳⡕⠅⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠔⡑⠕⠝⠄⡀⠄⠄⠊⢆⠂⠨⡪⣺⣮⣿⡾⡜⣜⡜⣄⠙⢞⣿⢿⡿⣗⢝⢸⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠠⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠊⠺⡹⠳⡙⡜⡓⡭⡺⡀⠄⠣⡻⡹⡸⠨⣣⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⣂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢄⠤⡤⡄⡆⡯⡢⡣⡣⡓⢕⠽⣄⠄⠨⡂⢌⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠆⠄⠸⡂⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⢀⠈⠄⠂⠁⠙⠝⠼⠭⠣⠣⠣⠑⠌⠢⠣⡣⡠⡘⣰⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢑⠄⠈⡱⠄⢘⠄⡀⠨⢐⣧⣳⣷⣶⣦⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⡶⠄⡠⡢⡕⣜⠎⡮⣣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠢⠄⠨⠄⠄⠣⡀⠄⢀⢀⢙⠃⡿⢿⠿⡿⡿⢟⢋⢔⡱⣝⢜⡜⡪⡪⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠅⠄⠡⠄⠄⠡⢀⢂⠢⡡⠡⠣⡑⣏⢯⡻⡳⣹⡺⡪⢎⠎⡆⢣⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⠄⠁⠄⢈⠄⢂⠕⡕⡝⢕⢎⢎⢮⢎⢯⢺⢸⢬⠣⢃⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠨⡐⠌⢆⢇⢧⢭⣣⡳⣵⢫⣳⢱⠱⢑⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⡊⢌⢢⢡⢣⢪⡺⡪⡎⡎⡎⡚⣨⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠕⡅⢗⢕⡳⡭⣳⢕⠕⡱⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠌⠄⠑⠩⢈⢂⣱⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⢄⠄⣀⠄⡀⣀⢠⢄⣖⣖⣞⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣱⡐⡕⡕⡽⣝⣟⣮⣾⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣵⣽⣸⣃⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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January 2021

Qtpie's doctor messages Qtpie about his donger cream needs

twitchquotes: Hello Qtpie, it's your doctor, DR. Dong calling about your donger cream needs, you havn't picked up your prescription in quite a while and we are worried your donger may be dry and crusty
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October 2014
imaqtpie

Hello gentleman, I have suffered a loss of 69K

Hello gentleman, I regretfully wish to share with you all that I shant comment on this Internet forum henceforth. As of the time of my arrival in this past autumn, I have suffered a loss of 69K. By the blessing of Lady Luck, I am still experiencing a positive net balance of 420%, so I have come to the conclusion I must liquidate my insignificant phallus account. I shall use this fortune for procuring a vaginal enlargement and acquire tremendous breasts for my OnlyAristocracy parchment. Or I may be devilish and maintain an investment position in TournamentCease. I am short of hours of leisure in life, training dogs to consume peanut butter from the reaches of my posterior and can not bare the rapid change of value of my investment holdings of 40 point 7 grand. I am aware that you, my peers of this financial derivatives Internet forum are filled with ecstasy to become privy to this, so copulate with yourself, I desire you all to be ablaze in nonheteronormative ursine hell in tandem with Sadam.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

T U C K F R U M P brofist edition

twitchquotes: ╭∩╮ ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ Hey F R U M P, here's a " T U C K " for you. ╭∩╮( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
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November 2014
Trump

Whisper solemnly into the dark. 'kripparrian'

twitchquotes: ｗａｋｉｎｇ ｓｕｄｄｅｎｌｙ． ｉ ｆｅｅｌ ｃｕｍ ｉｎ ｍｙ ｄｉａｐｅｒ． ｉ ｗｈｉｓｐｅｒ ｓｏｌｅｍｎｌｙ ｉｎｔｏ ｔｈｅ ｄａｒｋ． 'ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｒｉａｎ．'
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March 2014
Kripp
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