twitchquotes:
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I GIVE A DUCK ABOUT YOUR CHAT EXPERIENCE?
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I GIVE A DUCK ABOUT YOUR CHAT EXPERIENCE?
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What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink.
"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.
Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.
"Got a spare?" she asks.
"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.
"Conversation with me, duh."
I laugh.
"What's so funny?" she protests.
"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?"
"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.
"What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask.
"Teaching, I think."
"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"
"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"
"Bermuda," I say.
"Oh wow. That's lovely."
"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."
"What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires.
"I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
Classic
Everything points to Amogus
ππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏ
ππΏππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππΌππΌππΌππΌππΌππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππΌππ»ππ»ππ»ππΌππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππΌππ» ΰΆ ππ»ππΌππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππΌππ»ππ»ππ»ππΌππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππΌππΌππΌππΌππΌππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππΎππΏ
ππΏππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΏ
ππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏππΏ
Among Us / Amogus
Classic
Math is "mental abuse to humans"
twitchquotes:
You know how some people say that math is βmental abuse to humansβ? Well, lemme tell you one thing: βMathβ is an abbreviation for βmathematicsβ, so youβre only looking at 36% of the whole thing. What does the other 64% stand for? It stands for βexcept mostly at truly intelligently cool studentsβ! That means, if you think math is mentally abusing you, youβre not truly intelligent or cool! Youβre dumb and lame! So the next time someone gives you the first 36% of this ridiculous acronym, give them the other 64%. Donβt forget to tell them that they suck at etymology.
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Classic
Malta vs Penguins
Gr8 b8 m8
twitchquotes:
Gr8 b8, m8. I rel8, str8 appreci8, and congratul8. I r8 this b8 an 8/8. Plz no h8, I'm str8 ir8. Cre8 more, can't w8. We should convers8, I won't ber8, my number is 8888888, ask for N8. No calls l8 or out of st8. If on a d8, ask K8 to loc8. Even with a full pl8, I always have time to communic8 so don't hesit8, I hope you r8 8/8 .. m8.
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