[Copypasta] This is your father Vyascheslav from Moskva

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian, this is your father Vyascheslav from Moskva. I have started working overtime at the power plant, and your sister Tatyana has gone to Berlin to sell her body to Kraut swine for money. We do all this to pay for your "Stoned Heart of the Cards" game. Please win tournament and send us rubles soon, so our family can be together again.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
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There is a bunch of Twitch overlords

twitchquotes: There is a bunch of Twitch overlords who grow batches of streamers from genetically modified eggs. When these eggs hatch and grow, they are given their first computer and start streaming a Dora the Explorer game. As they grow up, the most popular streamers advance and are given more complex games to stream, from CoD to Hearthstone. Each streamer lives in a small cubicle, and there are hundreds upon hundreds of cubicles on the grounds of the Twitch Headquarters. deIlluminati
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground

twitchquotes: Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground, the adult marketplace. You've been ignoring my calls about your outstanding debt of $12.99 for Big Vegan Balls IV. I'm not here to shame or embarrass you for your taste in husky, sweaty man love, but I've got a business to run, and I wouldn't be able to provide you with the entertainment you frequently enjoy if I didn't get paid. Please don't make me revoke your platinum membership.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

This guy's hop is CRAZY

twitchquotes: This guy's hop is CRAZY OSFrog . My croak can't compete against a ribbit like that OSFrog . He lived in the correct swamp OSFrog . He needed precisely those two lily pads to beat me OSFrog . There were no flies I could catch OSFrog . He had the perfect tadpole OSFrog.
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Viewbots

Leifman is part of the Third Reich

twitchquotes: ｗｈｅｎ ｌｅｉｆｍａｎ ｍｏｄ ｔｈｅ ｃｈａｔ ａｕｔｏｍａｔｉｃａｌｌｙ ｇｏ ｔｏ ｒ９ｋ． ｌｅｉｆｍａｎ ｄｅｌｅｔｅ ｔｈｅ ｐａｓｔａ ａｎｄ ｆｅｅｌ ｈｅ ｉｓ ｏｎｅ ｗｉｔｈ ｔｈｅ ａｄｏｌｆ． ａｌｌ ｂｅｃｏｍｉｎｇ ｔｈｉｒｄ ｒｅｉｃｈ．ž
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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