[Copypasta] Secret Puerto Rican lover

twitchquotes: Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Classic

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

"Why does chat hate me?" Cybrix wonders

twitchquotes: Pizza. Pizza. The chat's hurtful words haunt Cybrix at night as he sleeps on his bed of bagel bites. "Why does chat hate me?" he wonders. One day he gets on Mumble and finds the chat no longer hates him. Because it turns out even an obese pizzabator is more tolerable than Rick.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Whisper solemnly into the dark. 'kripparrian'

twitchquotes: ｗａｋｉｎｇ ｓｕｄｄｅｎｌｙ． ｉ ｆｅｅｌ ｃｕｍ ｉｎ ｍｙ ｄｉａｐｅｒ． ｉ ｗｈｉｓｐｅｒ ｓｏｌｅｍｎｌｙ ｉｎｔｏ ｔｈｅ ｄａｒｋ． 'ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｒｉａｎ．'
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Repeating yourselves like parrots

twitchquotes: Wow, you imbeciles are especially stupid tonight. Repeating yourselves like parrots, spouting puerile taunts at each other, using crude 'emoticons'... Can you even form SENTENCES? One day you'll all be too dumb to even type your 'dongers,' and then twitch chat can finally have some merit. Until then, I'll stick to the moderated streams..
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

I hate Twitch Chat

Watch Kripp's stream as punishment

twitchquotes: I'm typing this from prison where we are forced to watch Kripp stream as our punishment. If he gets to 12 wins we will all be let go. Otherwise we will be executed tomorrow morning. Please Kripp, we're all rooting for you BlessRNG
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Dongerino goes all bongerino didgeridoo over my keyboard

twitchquotes: Ｗｈｅｎ Ｋｒｉｐｐ ｇｉｖｅｓ ｍｅ ｔｈｅ ｓｔａｒｅ， ｍｙ ｄｏｎｇｅｒｉｎｏ ｇｏｅｓ ａｌｌ ｂｏｎｇｅｒｉｎｏ ｄｉｄｇｅｒｉｄｏｏ ｏｖｅｒ ｍｙ ｋｅｙｂｏａｒｄ．
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp
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