Spice! 
And everything nice! 
These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect streamer. But Professor Reynad accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction - Chemical Vegan! Thus, the Kripp was born! 
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas
Kripp. It's Morpheus from future talking to you
twitchquotes:
Hello ĸrιpp, ιт’ѕ мorpнeυѕ ғroм ғυтυre тalĸιng тo yoυ. ι нave 2 cнoιceѕ ғor yoυ, вlυe pιll or red pιll. вlυe pιll вrιngѕ yoυ lιғe, woмen, cнιleттe, dog, caт, cнιld, caѕυalιтy and no vιewerѕ. red pιll вrιngѕ yoυ nolιғe, oj, no dιѕтracтιonѕ ғroм oυтѕιde world, pro ѕтaтυѕ and vιewerѕ. cнooѕe wιѕely мιѕтer ĸrιpperѕon.
twitch chat
Kripp
The tragedy of Darth Kripparian the Salty
twitchquotes:
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Kripparian the Salty? I thought not. It’s not a story the streamer would tell you. It’s a Salt legend. Darth Kripparian was a Dark Lord of the Salt, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create salt… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he couldn't even keep the cards he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be salty.
twitch chat
Kripp
Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise
salty
Grand Dragon Jebodiah Pasterino
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp, this is the Grand Dragon of the KKK, Jebodiah Pasterino. I see you're wearing one of our signature white hoods. We at the KKK do not associate with casuals such as yourself. Please remove the hood or we will take legal action.
twitch chat
Kripp
Reynad's Lawyer
twitchquotes:
༼ຈل͜ຈ༽_•︻̷̿┻̿═━一 Greetings, I am Reynad's new lawyer, Gino Pasterino. It appears you are playing one of my client's decks, which is now under copyright at the US patent offices. Please desist immediately or be subject to monetary fines and penalties. No cappuccino.
twitch chat
Kripp
Canadian man brofisting the local Greek population
twitchquotes:
Last night in Greece, Greek police heard reports of a Canadian man in a blue tacky sweater walking around the streets at night, 'brofisting' the local population. As a result 20,000 greek citizens have contracted the casualitis. If you see this man, please report to greek policerino department.
twitch chat
Kripp