[Copypasta] Only the chosen one can stack these cans!

twitchquotes: DrinkPurple Only the chosen one can stack these cans! PogChamp DrinkPurple but wait PogChamp can you do three cans! PogChamp PogChamp !! DrinkPurple
twitch chat
August 2016

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
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Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

CTRL+C CTRL+V ENTER

twitchquotes: You idly watching the stream, mindlessly wasting yet another evening. You notice 4+ length message in the chat. Grabbing the mouse, hovering over, scrolling up. Reading the message and realizing the pasta has no meaning at all. CTRL+C CTRL+V ENTER. You are retarded.
twitch chat
July 2020

Classic

My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

Classic

Do not fear a man that spams 1000 memes

twitchquotes: MingLee Do not fear a man that spams 1000 memes, instead fear a man that spams a meme 1000 times MingLee
twitch chat
June 2016

Classic

ASCENDED invisible spam

twitchquotes: ASCENDED invisible spam โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡โ€‡ โ€‡ โ€‡ PogChamp
twitch chat
March 2015

Classic

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