[Copypasta] Impossible to be happy and sad at the same time

twitchquotes: haHAA they say it's impossible to be happy & sad at the same time haHAA My wife told me i have the biggest d*ck out of all my brothers haHAA
twitch chat
October 2016
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

G2, aka “Gold 2”

twitchquotes: G2, aka “Gold 2”, named after their players average skill level. They are currently the best team in EU and are best known for their inting midlaner, CRAPS, and their inability to defeat PVB, Vietnam’s worst team.
twitch chat
September 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Cock and ball torture

Cock and ball torture (CBT) is a sexual activity involving application of pain or constriction to the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation or even kicking.[1] The recipient of such activities may receive direct physical pleasure via masochism, or emotional pleasure through erotic humiliation, or knowledge that the play is pleasing to a sadistic dominant. Many of these practices carry significant health risks.
August 2021

NSFW

PepePls

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⢿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⢀⡀⠤⠤⢄⣀⠐⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠐⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣉⣒⣄⠉⠉⠉⢉⣀⣂⠈⠙⠻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⡄⠀⠀⠀⠠⠤⣐⠭⠒⠉⠉⠉⠉⣒⣳⠈⠛⠂⠀⠀⣒⣛⡢⠈⢿ ⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠠⣤⣶⠖⠙⠀⡉⢻⡿⣶⣿⣿⠁⡂⠠⠈⢿⠗⢸ ⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠂⠭⠤⠤⠤⣤⠄⠊⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣿ ⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠒⠂⠈⠁⠘⢿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣟⣛⣛⣻⡶⠶⠶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡶⠾⢃⣼⣿ ⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢄⡀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠓⠛⠻⠿⠿⠷⠿⠟⢃⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⢠⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡶⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⠀⢠⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡄⠀⢠⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
September 2020

Pepe

Am I the asshole for dropping my 6 year old son at an orphanage for his inability to trade options?

This started about 4 years ago when my son was 2 years old. I started to supplement his picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I feel like he has retained absolutely nothing even though I have spent every waking minute trying to make him understand. I have done almost everything that I have thought of including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while he is sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make him understand the market. I felt as though I got to a breaking point when he couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. I finally convinced my wife that we were doing the right thing when I said that he will soon be a Wendy's worker begging his wife's husband for a weekly allowance because he will never amount to be anything. I couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy check out Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska and maybe your luck will be better than mine with him.
September 2021

Am I The Asshole?

WallStreetBets

Sadge brother letter

twitchquotes: 📜 ✍️ Sadge 𝓜𝔂 𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓽 𝓫𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻, 𝓘 𝔀𝓻𝓲𝓽𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓲𝓷 𝓭𝓮𝓮𝓹 𝓶𝓮𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓱𝓸𝓵𝔂. 𝓘𝓽 𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓼 𝓽𝓸 𝓶𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝓲𝓼𝓷'𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝓵𝓮𝓯𝓽
twitch chat
August 2020
Forsen
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing