[Copypasta] Impossible to be happy and sad at the same time

twitchquotes: haHAA they say it's impossible to be happy & sad at the same time haHAA My wife told me i have the biggest d*ck out of all my brothers haHAA
twitch chat
October 2016
I used to be a real ad
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Kermit the frog caused 9/11

Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
February 2021

Zhong Xina

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⢠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣦⣀⣾⣿⣟⣉⠉⠙⢛⡏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠚⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣗⣻⣿⣯⣥⣦⠄⣀⣾⡇⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣻⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣥⣾⣷⠶⠆⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠚⣿⣿⡻⠿⠿⠛⠙⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠂⠄⠄⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠿⠛⠉⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⣻⣿⣿⣧⣠⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠿⢿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⣿⡿⠃⢀⡠⠄⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
November 2021

Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG

Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG developed by a bunch of monkeys. Right away you'll notice Chess has no storyline. Instead, all you notice is the the White army and the Black army are fighting each other over a battlefield. Note the "a battlefield," because Chess only has one story map. As for the actual combat, it's extremely dull. Each unit can kill another with only one hit. This means units with a real good movement ability dominate the field (more on that bellow). There aren't even any combat animations or anything that happens in combat. One unit moves on it's space and "captures" it, and the piece is removed from the game with no form of action or special effects. Yawn. Chess has shitty class balance. The Queen is flat out overpowered while your actual front line units, the Pawns. can't do shit. I think the developers were afraid that no one would use the female character so they buffed up her abilities really high but now theres no point in using any other unit. The rest of the units suck. Rooks can only move in 4 directions, same with Bishops. Boring. Also, whats up with the Knight? It has the most bizzare combat abilities of all the units. They're retardly hard to use cause they jump around like retards to move and attack. The devs should have named this unit Ninja, since Knights didn't jump around like that in real life. Worst part, is the king. You see, the devs decided that if your king gets captured, you instantly lose the game. W-T-F? This wouldn't be a problem, except that he can't move for crap. Seriously, the most important unit in the game can only move 1 space a turn? Good luck keeping him alive while every other unit in the game dances around him. Unbalanced classes, lackluster gameplay, and not to mention repetitive 1 hour+ games. Chess is not worth the time or your money. Buy Final Fantasy Tactics or Disgaea instead. 3 out of 10.
December 2020

GameStop vs Amazon

i’m not sure how up to date you are on the whole GameStop situation but Amazon is heading for bankruptcy and GameStop is now their biggest competitor. market cap isn’t there yet, but the company plan is on track. also Jeff Bezos is the target of every major corporation now. Amazon CANT survive the next few years with their increasing bad reputation from littering and burning unused inventory to labor rights with their workers being violated. Amazon sounds great, until you look underneath the hood and see all the parts are grinding and screaming. GameStop is targeting Amazon to be the epicenter of e-commerce/gaming. this GameStop earnings has been MASSIVELY anticipated and i believe Amazon will continue to develop a negative correlation to GameStop. so what do they have to do with each other? competitors and GameStops about to make the move with a bite to the jugular.
September 2021

WallStreetBets

RIP Kattarian

twitchquotes: 2003-2014 R I P Kattarian, you will be missed. I know Kripp would do unspeakable sexual things to you off stream and he killed you in a salt rage after getting top decked and then tells us that you are "temporarily gone" but just know this, chat loved you and we know you're in a better place safe from Kripp's evil
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
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