[Copypasta] So you start reading a copy pasta...

twitchquotes: So you start reading a copy pasta... wondering when it will get good. It's a large wall of text, there must be something of substance somewhere in here, right? You scroll up to stop the chat elevator so you can finish reading it. But then you realize... It's just a waste of your time. It's just a large wall of text that is completely useless. It's a waste of everyone's time... Regardless, you highlight the text, Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V and hit Enter...
twitch chat
November 2016
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

The ultimate tool to win any argument you're in, works even if you're losing

That's a nice argument you have, but unfortunately, I had sexual intercourse with your mother, therefore rendering any point you make null.
May 2021

Trolling My Dad's Office with Among Us (Office Series Part 6, Finale Part 3)

The other day, it was โ€œtake your kid to work dayโ€ at my dadโ€™s job. It was really epic and poggers because I got to skip school for it. As we were walking in, I couldnโ€™t help but notice that the company logo roughly resembled a crewmate from the popular game, Among Us. I asked my father, โ€œIs this the Among Us but real??โ€ My dad replied โ€œNo, son, this is the Pepsico corporate office.โ€ As we entered the building, my dad said โ€œSon, I have a lot of work to do today. You can hang out with the other kids or play on your phone, just please stay on this floor.โ€ He then entered the elevator and left. I turned to the other kids (who were all playing on their phones) and said โ€œDoes anyone wanna play some Among Us?โ€ However, no one else wanted to play. I was getting bored, so I decided to explore around a little bit. I walked into the elevator and pressed the button for the top floor.As the elevator door opened, I saw what appeared to be a long hallway. As I was walking down it, I found a door that was labeled โ€œExecutive Meeting Roomโ€. The door was unlocked, so I walked in and there were about 15 people in suits and ties around a table. They all looked up at me in confusion. One of them asked me โ€œHey buddy, are you lost?โ€ I noticed that his nametag read โ€œHugh Johnson, CFOโ€. โ€œDoes CFO stand for Chungus Fortnite Officer?โ€, I asked. โ€œNo, it does not. And where is your parent? Go back to the bottom floor young man!โ€ He was yelling at me. So I said โ€œYouโ€™re sus. I should eject you, Hugh Johnson. Do you have aโ€ฆ HUGE JOHNSON?! Thatโ€™s funny like Big Chungus, which is the Bugs Bunny from Looney Tunes but a big rabbit!โ€ I laughed. Everyone was looking up at me in shock when I said โ€œWanna play some Among Us guys?โ€ The CEO, a very sexy woman, ooga booga awooga, said โ€œYoung man, go back to the first floor now!โ€ But the sexy woman I just couldnโ€™t listen to as I admired her. โ€œNo, because you have big tits.โ€ Her jaw dropped, and she said, โ€œYoung man, this is an important meeting. Get the fuck out!โ€ She then used the intercom to call security. Coming to the realization that I was running out of time, I pulled down my pants to show everyone my Among Us underwear. I jumped up onto the meeting table and started twerking (to make sure everyone saw my among us underwear I got for Christmas) and said โ€œDo you like what you see?โ€ Everyone was yelling at me to get out as I was twerking. โ€œIโ€™m so hot~~~~โ€ I said. The yelling got louder. I ran out of the door and closed it, hoping that security wouldnโ€™t find me. I quickly ran into the elevator and went down.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Can you please stop making me sweat for more salt?

twitchquotes: reynad, everytime I watch you I start sweating, I believe this is because you have the power to harvest salt through my pores even through the internet, can you please stop making me sweat for more salt?
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

salty

have you ever had a dream like this?

have you ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿฟ ever ๐Ÿ˜  had a dreams ๐Ÿ˜ด๐Ÿ’ญ- thats โœ”- that you ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘ค uhm ๐Ÿ˜ค you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ had you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ- you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ could- you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ do what you ๐Ÿ‘‰ want ๐Ÿ˜- you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ could do- so you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ๐Ÿ‘ฆ- you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ do- you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ could do you ๐Ÿค–๐Ÿ‘ˆ- you ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿ‘‰ wan ๐Ÿ”‘- you ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿ‘‰ want ๐Ÿ˜‹ him ๐Ÿ‘ด to do so much ๐Ÿ”ฅ that you ๐Ÿ‘‰ could do anything ๐Ÿ’ฐ?
April 2021

Emoji Pasta

Kripp defending Blizzard on Diablo Immortal

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, video game journalist and decent human being here. Looking to get your thoughts on the disgusting response of entitled gamers to the Diablo Immortal reveal. On a scale from Hitler (least evil) to Straight White Male PC Gamer (most evil), how would you characterize those who criticize Blizzard? Hope to hear you are as unbiased as I am, thanks!
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing