[Copypasta] I am... the Kripp

twitchquotes: My name is Octavian Morosan, and I am the saltiest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary vegan, but secretly, with the help of my friends at P.E.T.A. Labs, I play childrens card games and find other babies like me. I BM'd the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one salty enough to complain about going second. them. I am... The Kripp!
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp
Variation of The Flash's opening quote: "My name is Barry Allen, and I am the fastest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary forensic scientist, but secretly, with the help of my friends at S.T.A.R. Labs, I fight crime and find other meta-humans like me. I hunted the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one fast enough to stop them. I am... The Flash!"
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp's kidney stone surgery

twitchquotes: There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

I put my cursor over Kripp's and pretend we're holding hands

twitchquotes: (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ) sometimes... when i have a bad day.... I put my cursor over Kripp's and pretend that we're holding hands (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ)
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Classic

Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth

twitchquotes: High in orbit, the Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth. They prepare to enslave the world and mine it for all its salt, but the scanners detect an abnormally high concentration inside a tiny shack in Greece. The invasion won't be necessary. "Lock onto him with the RNG disruptor," says the captain, greedily. "Soon we shall have all the salt we need."
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Classic

salty

This is the Prismata Police

twitchquotes: (β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β–€ΜΏ ΜΏ) This is the Prismata Police, You're coming wi... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Breakdown of Kripp stream

twitchquotes: Breakdown of Kripp stream: β˜‘ always 1 hr late β˜‘ 20 minute intro β˜‘ bit sleepy today β˜‘ foodie time β˜‘ constant salt/complaining β˜‘ 1 hr of actual gameplay β˜‘ ending stream early β˜‘ no stream tomorrow
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp
More Kripp Copypastas
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