[Copypasta] I am... the Kripp

twitchquotes: My name is Octavian Morosan, and I am the saltiest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary vegan, but secretly, with the help of my friends at P.E.T.A. Labs, I play childrens card games and find other babies like me. I BM'd the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one salty enough to complain about going second. them. I am... The Kripp!
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp
Variation of The Flash's opening quote: "My name is Barry Allen, and I am the fastest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary forensic scientist, but secretly, with the help of my friends at S.T.A.R. Labs, I fight crime and find other meta-humans like me. I hunted the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one fast enough to stop them. I am... The Flash!"
I used to be a real ad
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Doggies can be vegan too

twitchquotes: I am a dog being raised by a very loving family. Or at least I was, until a balding romanian gypsy kidnapped me from my home. Now he doesn't let me go outside and doesn't feed me. Every time I try to tell him I am hungry he puts green leaves in my bowl and says doggies can be vegan too if they try hard enough. I believe this man is mentally disabled. Please send help. OhMyDog
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Dear Kripp, I am a salt manufacturer from Chile

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I am a salt manufacturer from Chile and I would like to sponsor you and your channel. If this deal goes through you can make a lot of salt from our overflowing salt mines. From what I hear, salt is a hot commodity nowadays. Forever yours, Felipe Gomez
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

i graduated top of my class from burger king

twitchquotes: you fucking vegan, ill have you know i graduated top of my class from burger king university in burger flipping and have flipped over 9000 burgers in my day you dumb vegan, but you wouldn't know that would you you soy muncher? If you said that to my face I would be flipping patties all over your vegan face and you'd be full of my meat before you even knew what was happening.
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

Kripp's streaming checklist

twitchquotes: *stretch* โ˜‘ "mmmm kay" โ˜‘ "yeah alright" โ˜‘ "fuckin A" โ˜‘ "if he drew anything else I would've won" โ˜‘ "how's this guy SO LUCKY?" โ˜‘ "TOPDECK FLAMESTRIKE, YEAP" โ˜‘ "topdeck into topdeck into topdeck, yeah that's how you get 12 wins guys" โ˜‘
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Dear Mr. Morosan, this is the Hellenic Ministry of Health

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan, this is the Hellenic Ministry of Health. We have received reports of excessive PJSalt production on your Twitch channel. You are a toxic individual and are hereby classified a Class A threat to national security. Please turn yourself in at the nearest Kappa station to be deported.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

salty

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