[Copypasta] Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name

twitchquotes: Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name. Thy Bad RNG come. Thy topdecks be done. On Arena as it is in Ranked. Give us this day our daily rant. And forgive us our button presses as we forgive those who don't press theirs against us. For thine is the never lucky. The bullsh*t RNG. Forever and ever. Ameno.
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

I'm jealous of Kripp's gangsta lifestyle

twitchquotes: I'm jealous of Kripp's gangsta lifestyle ... the baller veganism ... the high fibre diet ... the dope falafel wraps. The dude is regular!
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here. I understand you are willing to sell yourself out like a cheap Romanian hooker to any two-bit game development outfit as long as they dangle some shekels in front of your beady little eyes? Great! Because I have this brilliant game in beta testing right now called "Watching Paint Dry" and I am willing to pay you $5.00 USD to play it for 24 hours straight. Let me know what you think, you glorious sellout!
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

sellout

Classic

Minion Masters turned my life around

twitchquotes: I was sat in my car with the exhaust connected to the window, waiting to die, until I saw an ad on my phone for Minion Masters, at that moment I turned the engine off and decided to turn my life around. Now I have a 12 inch cock and 3 ferraris, and all it took was the $149.99 package (best value).
twitch chat
March 2019
Kripp

sellout

Message Dongered

twitchquotes: <ᴍᴇssᴀɢᴇ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀᴇᴅ>
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Pornhub's message to Kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, this is the administrator of PornHub™ we have noticed you haven’t logged in for 2 weeks, we’re just checking to see if everything is okay and we’ve prepared you a list of videos from your favourite category (Asian). See you soon!
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing