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π π π only a real human being can build a proper face π
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More Copypastas
"Why does chat hate me?" Cybrix wonders
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Pizza. Pizza. The chat's hurtful words haunt Cybrix at night as he sleeps on his bed of bagel bites. "Why does chat hate me?" he wonders. One day he gets on Mumble and finds the chat no longer hates him. Because it turns out even an obese pizzabator is more tolerable than Rick.
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Kripp
UPLOADING VIRUS EXE
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UPLOADING VIRUS EXE ββββββββββββββββ] 98%
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Reynad
Lying about service dogs
I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask;
βIs it a service dog?β
With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to.
If at first they say βnoβ I reply with βare you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?βwith another big wink
Always works.
I love dogs
In Korea, heart surgeon
Number one. Steady hand. One day, Kim Jong Un need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Kim Jong Un die! SSD very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life.
My big secret. I kill Kim Jong Un on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
Classic
without throwing your cat across the room
twitchquotes:
Hello this is Twitch staff. Unfortunately we have been notified that you have now reached 24 hours of stream time without throwing your cat across the room. As stated in our TOS, we require that all streamers must throw at least one pet a distance of 3 metres on camera in order to maintain the ability to stream. Failure to do so will result in your stream being disabled permanently. We will now unfortunately have to terminate your account. Thank you for your cooperation.
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